Funny 80's David Lee Roth quote... [Archive]

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blood5150

01-02-2009, 01:32 PM

"Music journalists love Elvis Costello and hate me because they look like Elvis Costello"

http://www.tvgasm.com/shows/images/makemeasupermodel/season1/David%20Lee%20Roth_b.jpg

http://www.morethings.com/music/costello/elvis_costello_pictures/elvis_costello_as_herman_munster.jpg

PS... I happen to like BOTH of them!

xntrick

01-02-2009, 01:49 PM

my favorite from DLR:

"when large groups of people get together, their collective temperature goes up and their collective IQ goes down"

fetishfrog

01-02-2009, 02:16 PM

'I went to Vegas in a $90,000 porsche. I lost everything and came home in a $300,000 bus...does that mean I came out ahead?'

cottoneyedjoe

01-02-2009, 02:23 PM

"The two most dreaded words in the English lexicon are 'band meeting'".

That is my favorite DLR quote...

andybaylor

01-02-2009, 02:26 PM

"I used to jog, but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass"

CommonJim

01-02-2009, 02:42 PM

Money won't buy you happiness but it will buy you a large boat and you can sail up next to it."

-DLR

daddyo

01-02-2009, 03:12 PM

Say what you will about Dave, he was the spark plug of Van Halen.

cugel

01-02-2009, 03:25 PM

"man needs love to live and i'm the living proof"

guitarslinger21

01-02-2009, 03:26 PM

on of my favorite DLR quotes:

POP: If Van Halen were to approach you about getting back together...

DLR: Not without a lawyer and a valium!

GerryJ

01-02-2009, 03:32 PM

http://x1a.xanga.com/4c3a04e37573162861603/b42145731.jpg

Well, Dave, here's Mrs. Elvis Costello, the very talented jazz pianist/singer Diana Krall.

I'd say Game Over ;).

guitarslinger21

01-02-2009, 04:19 PM

http://x1a.xanga.com/4c3a04e37573162861603/b42145731.jpg

Well, Dave, here's Mrs. Elvis Costello, the very talented jazz pianist/singer Diana Krall.

I'd say Game Over ;).

Game over how?

David Lee Roth has been worshiped and pleasured by thousands of women of the same caliber as the individual you posted.

I don't see how it's "game over":dunno

dkaplowitz

01-02-2009, 04:23 PM

"The two most dreaded words in the English lexicon are 'band meeting'".
Wow, I'm sure he had good reason for that quote too. I can only imagine how some of those band meetings went! :D

They were stupid to let him go, everything after that was soft rock at best.

It's Time!

01-02-2009, 04:28 PM

http://x1a.xanga.com/4c3a04e37573162861603/b42145731.jpg

Well, Dave, here's Mrs. Elvis Costello, the very talented jazz pianist/singer Diana Krall.

I'd say Game Over ;).

http://www.watches-for-china.ch/local/cache-vignettes/L150xH210/rolex_3_krall-s-7b465.jpg
http://www.rolex.com/en/media/images/world-of-rolex/sports-culture/ambassadors-thearts/diana-krall.jpg

guitgator

01-02-2009, 06:52 PM

I just watched a Diana Krall concert the other day and I must say she doesn't really look like that woman!

Sorta like when people post airbrushed pics of other stars and musicians....Cameron Diaz, Sheryl Crow etc. You see these folks up close and you realize they actually do have wrinkles, pimples and crows feet...not to mention..pores.

they don't call 'em "image makers" for nothin'.

derekd

01-02-2009, 07:02 PM

I don't care what she looks like (okay you got me, of course I do), DK is a killer player, great singer, and has a very tight, swinging band.

cottoneyedjoe

01-02-2009, 07:04 PM

I betcha DLR would hit that....:roll

walterw

01-02-2009, 08:40 PM

Game over how?

David Lee Roth has been worshiped and pleasured by thousands of women of the same caliber as the individual you posted.

I don't see how it's "game over":dunno
looks-wise sure, but brains & talent-wise? unlikely.

my favorite? (probably stolen from henny youngman or somebody):
"my uncle told me, 'dave, in all things in life, sincerity is the key; once you can fake that, you've got it made!'"

jammybastard

01-02-2009, 09:35 PM

My fave DLR quotes...

"I used to have a drug problem but now I have enough money."

"I am not the aggressive force in question. I am merely the pond, placid and still, reflecting the oncoming rock."

shredtrash

01-02-2009, 09:44 PM

Roth is the man! Check out the interview part starting about 3:35.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zlcjb4Y7lE8

Man with Gas

01-02-2009, 09:57 PM

My fave DLR quotes...

"I used to have a drug problem but now I have enough money."

"I am not the aggressive force in question. I am merely the pond, placid and still, reflecting the oncoming rock."

DLR IS Mr Show Business!! :bow

The man's mouth should be in the Smithsonian. A legendary performer of our times.

Eskimo_Joe

01-02-2009, 09:57 PM

Say what you will about Dave, he was the spark plug of Van Halen.

agreed

Eskimo_Joe

01-02-2009, 10:03 PM

http://x1a.xanga.com/4c3a04e37573162861603/b42145731.jpg

Well, Dave, here's Mrs. Elvis Costello, the very talented jazz pianist/singer Diana Krall.

I'd say Game Over ;).

If you don't think DLR has pulled women much hotter than this one, you must be crazy, seriously.

dkaplowitz

01-02-2009, 10:16 PM

Why is there a discussion about people's girlfriends/wives/fiancees happening here? Stupidest thread tangent ever!

paraedolia

01-02-2009, 10:22 PM

I think I'd rather look like Elvis Costello now that Dave Lee Roth now.
One of them looks like a ridiculous aging walking groin desperately trying unsuccessfully to hang onto his fading youth...

I'd also rather have 1/10 of Declan's body of work behind me that all of Dave's.

AmpliFIRE

01-02-2009, 10:30 PM

try this on for size

http://www.thetyser.com/

:roll

Unabender

01-03-2009, 12:53 AM

DLR seems to me a bit dual sided person - on the other hand he's a rock icon and a "dude", but on the other hand seems like a really intelligent and clever guy. It's almost like he plays the "rock dude" person in public and portrays himself as a one dimensional party hard kind of guy.

I would not be surprised one bit if he was the smartest guy in Van Halen... He certainly gave the band the party band image which lead to fame in the '80's... Looking back, I think that was calculated. A good thing IMO.

isfahani

01-03-2009, 01:45 AM

Well, Dave, here's Mrs. Elvis Costello, the very talented jazz pianist/singer Diana Krall.

I'd say Game Over ;).

I'd say... What's your point? Is she supposed to be attractive for some reason?

Thank ghod I like DLR and Elvis Costello equally for very different reasons. And as much as DLR plays the "rock dude", if you recall, EC was posing wildly way back when as well.

Unabender

01-03-2009, 01:57 AM

And as much as DLR plays the "rock dude", if you recall, EC was posing wildly way back when as well.

Didn't DLR leave Van Halen in the first place because Eddie wanted less show and more serious rock?

6Tones

01-03-2009, 02:35 AM

I betcha DLR would hit that....:roll
With his mic stand:Spank

Gas-man

01-03-2009, 07:03 AM

She's rather a...how to say...handsome woman isn't she?

That jaw could cut diamonds!

http://www.rolex.com/en/media/images/world-of-rolex/sports-culture/ambassadors-thearts/diana-krall.jpg

Thwap

01-03-2009, 07:15 AM

She's rather a...how to say...handsome woman isn't she?

That jaw could cut diamonds!

:rotflmao

Diamond Dave, is that you????

todd richman

01-03-2009, 07:17 AM

"I used to play water polo, then my horse drowned!" ALways loved that quote form DLR.

He actually did a 10 minute tirade about music critics and Costello on stage in October 1982 at the Spectrum in Philly-I was there and thought it was hilarious. That was on Diver Down when VH could still rock. Eddie even played with a cast on his right arm that night after "falling off a bed in NYC" a few days before.

thelionsden

01-03-2009, 07:20 AM

try this on for size

http://www.thetyser.com/

:roll

That was fun! (click on those links... :)

andybaylor

01-03-2009, 07:27 AM

http://x1a.xanga.com/4c3a04e37573162861603/b42145731.jpg

Well, Dave, here's Mrs. Elvis Costello, the very talented jazz pianist/singer Diana Krall.

I'd say Game Over ;).

Lotta Photoshop "blur" on this pic.

Also, I wonder if Photshop has a "Boob Tool" as well...Photoshop CS4 has a number of new features!

I'm just sayin...

edgewound

01-03-2009, 07:32 AM

I'm just sayin...

...she's a lot better lookin' than those of you trashing her looks.

Sexy and talented....nice combo.

Post Van Halen, DLR made a complete fool of himself on Jay Leno...being the "song and dance man".

The awkwardness was palpable, Jay Leno was visibly uncomfortable....and DLR's voice cracked....it was really sad.

BobbyRay

01-03-2009, 07:43 AM

Why is there a discussion about people's girlfriends/wives/fiancees happening here? Stupidest thread tangent ever!

Hot women = "Stupidest thread tangent ever!" ????

Says you.

I happen to have a real appreciation of hot women.

Teleplayer

01-03-2009, 07:50 AM

DLR = the man behind the VH party, humor and show. Great entertainer, as long as you get that he was laughing at himself, the band and the whole shtick.

GerryJ

01-03-2009, 09:27 AM

I'd say... What's your point? Is she supposed to be attractive for some reason?..

My point was to raise a smile, not an argument. The juxtaposition of the nerdy guy/ hot girl pictures. "Well, I may be a Nerd, but I'm no fool."
'Game over' - poor choice of words on my part. meant as in 'oh, never mind', not as a competition between the two.

"DLR = the man behind the VH party, humor and show. Great entertainer, as long as you get that he was laughing at himself, the band and the whole shtick."
(teleplayer) . Word.

dkaplowitz

01-03-2009, 09:32 AM

Hot women = "Stupidest thread tangent ever!" ????

Says you.

I happen to have a real appreciation of hot women.
Thanks for that completely irrelevant comment. You've convinced me you're not gay. Congratulations!

JB Eckl

01-03-2009, 10:54 AM

I though the 'game over' post was pererty funny, but that photo of Krall is cheeeeeeezy. She's talented enough (and hot enough) not to have to resort to the ol' 'almost nipple!' shot. Very Britney.

More Dave quotes!!!!!!!!

tjmicsak

01-03-2009, 11:23 AM

saltydogg

01-03-2009, 11:35 AM

try this on for size

http://www.thetyser.com/

:roll

Thanks for the LAUGH! I can't wait to use it periodically at work on Monday- at high volumes! :D

daddyo

01-03-2009, 11:45 AM

I honestly think that While Dave was a constant "fresh" chemist in the manners and showmanship of his Schtick, Eddy was struggling to be creative, eventually resorting to keyboards for his creativity to keep rolling. He came out with ground breaking technique and flash on the guitar, but eventually all that becamse the some old same old. A guy like Dave with that personality was neverending. I think he himself needed more avenues for letting all that out. I think his first couple solo releases were way cool and his use of light humor in everything was genius. I see alot of similarities between Dave and Gene Simmons, although Daves humor and character was meant to be over-the-top, Gene would play the straight man who would purposefully illustrate the over-the-top personality of Ace.
Both were purposeful showman of the highest professionalism.
I also seem to recall that time took it's toll on both DLR and VH even though they both had alternate performers who filled the voids easily.
DLR in my opinion has to be one of the most brilliant entertainers of our time. He was no slouch and I would think worked very hard at his craft. To be physically conditioned, mentally sharp, comically creative and entertaining as a front man is something you don't see at all anymore.
That all added up to the crazyness of VH that was just is entertaining as the music.
Exactly!
Dave is first and foremost and entertainer in the grand vaudeville tradition. He knows rock is just a show. A circus. He also fully understood and mastered the MTV medium. Dave would've been a star in 1920, 1940, or 1978. Dave knew how to give the people great schtick and send them home smiling. Eddie was trapped by the need to be a serious artist. Maybe he'd read a bio on John Lennon. Problem was, aside from his mad talents on the guitar, he had no talent. The songwriting while fine cockrock, is as shallow as spit on the sidewalk. Eddie tried to be some sort of harder Journey with Sammy but it was dross (and I don't care how many albums got sold - none of that stuff is remembered or covered). I saw VH during the 5150 tour and Eddie barely smiled. Sammy did his best to be DLR but the smirk and wink are not his style. Dave's main problem is that his persona didn't age well and his actual singing talents were inadequate for him to evolve into more mature music genres.

FPFL

01-03-2009, 12:01 PM

I'd also rather have 1/10 of Declan's body of work behind me that all of Dave's.

For all the debates I've ever read, I've NEVER disagreed with someone more. I'd give my left one and a lot more to have my name on the Dave era VH catalog in any way. "Guy who went to the store for some fresh tubes and beer..."

Even the albums with Sheehan/Vai were fun. Remember fun anybody?

The classic VH catalog is worth its weight in flawless diamonds! The "talent" of this guy vs that one - an eternally pointless debate. Dave stuck it to another performer to make a point about his critics, not becuase he had any obvious enmity towards the guy. Like everything else, you know Dave said it with a smile. You would do well to follow in his footsteps rather than get bent! : )

-P

paraedolia

01-03-2009, 12:10 PM

For all the debates I've ever read, I've NEVER disagreed with someone more. I'd give my left one and a lot more to have my name on the Dave era VH catalog in any way. "Guy who went to the store for some fresh tubes and beer..."

Even the albums with Sheehan/Vai were fun. Remember fun anybody?

The classic VH catalog is worth its weight in flawless diamonds! The "talent" of this guy vs that one - an eternally pointless debate. Dave stuck it to another performer to make a point about his critics, not becuase he had any obvious enmity towards the guy. Like everything else, you know Dave said it with a smile. You would do well to follow in his footsteps rather than get bent! : )
-PFair enough. I've had disagreements over more important things than Dave Lee Roth. I did go see him on the Skyscraper tour with Steve Vai, but Sheehan had bailed at the beginning of the tour so they replaced him with samples and tape loops and some guy posing with a bass. It was a bit of a cynical show, and the whole thing seemed like going through the motions.
Not getting bent at all. But I would be more embarassed to wake up one morning and discover I'd been a dork in a spandex jumpsuit for 25 years than Elvis Costello. Each to their own.

Zero

01-03-2009, 12:22 PM

Love the 'band meeting' quote. So true.

blood5150

01-03-2009, 12:40 PM

Fair enough. I've had disagreements over more important things than Dave Lee Roth. I did go see him on the Skyscraper tour with Steve Vai, but Sheehan had bailed at the beginning of the tour so they replaced him with samples and tape loops and some guy posing with a bass. It was a bit of a cynical show, and the whole thing seemed like going through the motions.
Not getting bent at all. But I would be more embarassed to wake up one morning and discover I'd been a dork in a spandex jumpsuit for 25 years than Elvis Costello. Each to their own.

That guy that you think posed with a bass was Greg Bissonettes brother... who has also played with Satriani... he is no billy sheehan.. but he is not a bad player either...

guitarslinger21

01-03-2009, 01:56 PM

A+ thread, would read again.

any more DLR quotes?

cottoneyedjoe

01-03-2009, 02:17 PM

Not to get on a VH tangent, but it was good to see that DLR was the "stable" guy on the last tour. It actually raised his PR about twenty notches. I was happy for him.

I hope Eddie let's him do another....tour that is....

Man with Gas

01-03-2009, 02:37 PM

it was good to see that DLR was the "stable" guy on the last tour. It actually raised his PR about twenty notches. I was happy for him.
:agree:agree:agree:agree AND :agree

iamdavea

01-03-2009, 02:50 PM

Let's not forget that Costello famously spent "quality time" with noted groupie supreme Bebe Buell--he's had his share of rock star excesses.

iamdavea

01-03-2009, 02:53 PM

"If I have money, YOU have money;
if I have food, YOU have food;
if I have a great looking woman...you still have food." DLR

GerryJ

01-03-2009, 03:23 PM

"If I have money, YOU have money;
if I have food, YOU have food;
if I have a great looking woman...you still have food." DLR

:rotflmao

Where do you guys find these things!?!

justin

01-03-2009, 04:03 PM

Here is one of my faves: Asked about changing the band name from David Lee Roth Band.

"DLR Band means Dave, Lowery, and Ray. I named it that because it sounds more like a band than David Lee Roth, which just sounds like a person. When you hear David Lee Roth - you think of a person. When you hear DLR Band - you think of a band. Just like when you hear Eddie Van Halen you think of a person, and when you hear Van Halen - you think of David Lee Roth!"

codeorama

01-03-2009, 04:08 PM

MrMike

01-03-2009, 04:39 PM

This one's not quite so comical, but after 5150 came out and there was all the Roth vs. Hagar mudslinging going on, Dave said something about how "Every night Sammy gets to go out there with those guys and sing songs that I wrote. I can promise you that you'll never hear me singing a Sammy Hagar song."

Dean_E

01-03-2009, 05:44 PM

Here's a couple for ya. I really gained a lot of respect for Dave when he & VH geared up for their tour in 07. Dave was the sensible & most professional one out of the whole bunch.

"Live and steamy right before your naked eyes. Entrances and exits are everything. There's some kind of an psychological law that says you need to be the very first or the last thing. This is show business"

"The differences between Sammy and I is Sammy throws a party and I am the party".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-2AHTL9ncM

Dean

paraedolia

01-07-2009, 01:08 AM

That guy that you think posed with a bass was Greg Bissonettes brother... who has also played with Satriani... he is no billy sheehan.. but he is not a bad player either...He was miming though, as was the drummer (at least to a degree). They had massive tape/sample backup at least when I saw them. Drummer's doing a straight 4/4--I can see him--somehow he's doing tom runs and all sorts of other stuff too without moving hishands from the snare/hi-hat. Bass player did the same thing...he's clapping hands over head and catching cymbals and clowning around but all the while the bass is thumping away. Doubleplusnotgood was I wanted to see Billy Sheehan play. Bummer. DLR was sure energetic though.

blood5150

01-07-2009, 09:17 AM

He was miming though, as was the drummer (at least to a degree). They had massive tape/sample backup at least when I saw them. Drummer's doing a straight 4/4--I can see him--somehow he's doing tom runs and all sorts of other stuff too without moving hishands from the snare/hi-hat. Bass player did the same thing...he's clapping hands over head and catching cymbals and clowning around but all the while the bass is thumping away. Doubleplusnotgood was I wanted to see Billy Sheehan play. Bummer. DLR was sure energetic though.

They did have a keyboard player as well on that tour, Brett Tuggle.... he may have been laying down bass on the keys as well....

TNJ

01-07-2009, 01:03 PM

Entertainer/Frontman/Lyricist/Stylist/Rock Gawd...

DLR for sure is top tier in all these categories.

I dig Sammy, too...but he has always been more about the voice,
than anything else. Nothing wrong with that...but DLR in his prime
was a force of nature.

To have seen VH in their prime with Diamond Dave holding court would have been a once in a lifetime experience.
Plus, he's a Hoosier (like me)...then again, so is Axl Rose!!! :eek:
What does that say about our State? :D

Anyways...GO DAVE!!!!

S.
j

pickaguitar

01-07-2009, 01:17 PM

edgewound

01-07-2009, 01:51 PM

Yeah...

I'm sure the first time you heard Van Halen's rendition of "You Really Got Me"...your first though was, "Holy sh*t...Who's that singer?":jo

If it wasn't for Eddie, there would be no Dave. Dave went away for awhile when he found out it wasn't all about him.

Dean_E

01-07-2009, 04:55 PM

I'm sure the first time you heard Van Halen's rendition of "You Really Got Me"...your first though was, "Holy sh*t...Who's that singer?":jo

I was in 7th grade when VH hit the seen with "You Really Got Me". I thought who the hell ruined this Kinks song?!! They suck! A couple of years later when I was 15, I heard "You're gonna get some leg tonite for sure. Tell us how you do. Come on Dave, give me a break". I was like who the hell is this, they ROCK! It took me a couple of months to find out they're the ones who trashed the Kinks song. It was to late. I was hooked, lined and sinkered.

Dean

Cody

01-07-2009, 05:07 PM

I'm going to have to paraphrase, as I don't feel like searching for the exact quote. It's from a DLR magazine interview (Creem?) in the early '80s.

The interviewer wants to make a point about the amount of women in the audience.

Interviewer: "Did you ever think that maybe the women are coming --".

Dave interrupts: "Constantly, Jay. It's a major source of my inspiration, and I'm glad you brought it up."

m.z.

01-07-2009, 05:19 PM

try this on for size

http://www.thetyser.com/

:roll

I love you dearly for posting this.

Red Suede

01-07-2009, 06:05 PM

I remember when he was at the MTV awards and some reporter must have asked him something about how he would feel if Van Halen didn't win. He's there with two gorgeous blondes, obviously inebriated, and responds, "well it's not whether you win or lose, it's how good you look", with that grin of his. Hilarious!