My wife and my mom ... [Archive]

French Fry

11-26-2009, 10:58 AM

So my mom exploded at my wife on tuesday and we're now back up to defcon 5... never been this far in the red before.

Let me just say ... this is awesome. Families are so much fun.

What the #$@%# is it about wife and mother in law relationships?
:facepalm :nuts

5E3

11-26-2009, 11:00 AM

Nobody knows. :D

LHanson

11-26-2009, 11:01 AM

I own that t-shirt. Camping in Big Bend Nat. Park, Mom had too much boxed wine and told my wife off. We had park rangers coming over and everything. Strained relations ever since.

Bussman

11-26-2009, 11:02 AM

My wife gets along great with my mom. My mom always tells my wife that she has "saved her son". She's probably right. My wife and her mother, now that's another story <shudders>.

anathema

11-26-2009, 11:02 AM

mom died when I was 10, so dont have to deal with it. But I can imagine it being stressful.

soapvox speaker

11-26-2009, 11:02 AM

i keep hearing about this 'rivalry' between wives/moms. my girl and mother get along like gangbusters. in fact, i think they like each other better than they like me.

ikan

11-26-2009, 11:06 AM

Edited Bussman's post to suit me:

My wife gets along great with my mom. My wife and her mother, now that's another story <shudders>.

captain_bob

11-26-2009, 11:06 AM

Man I feel your pain. There was an argument between my step-mom and wife 7 years ago and there are still bad feelings.

LavaMan

11-26-2009, 11:21 AM

I know just how you are feeling....had to send my Mom home early several years ago...(her fault too...she's bi-polar unfortunatley)

amigo30

11-26-2009, 11:33 AM

I know just how you are feeling....had to send my Mom home early several years ago...(her fault too...she's bi-polar unfortunatley)

I've been there. Right after Christmas dinner one year my mom exploded at my brother in law over something super trivial. Attempts at being reasonable with her caused things to escalate to ridiculous levels, and the final solution was me rounding up my mother, putting her in the car, and driving 3 hours round trip to take her to her home. That was fun.

I've been much less inclined to host multi-state family gatherings at my home since then.

Guitar55

11-26-2009, 11:34 AM

My wife gets along great with my mom and I love my In-laws.

lcjc800

11-26-2009, 11:48 AM

alpha female dominance,
YOU won't win, and no matter which one of them wins, YOU lose....

garage.....build one......

Thwap

11-26-2009, 11:50 AM

My Mom has beat on my wife for 20 years.

We just avoid her for the most part now.

mge80

11-26-2009, 11:53 AM

My mom also died before I met my wife...but I love her's to death (and vice versa) and get along well with her dad, although we don't see each other very often.

I do recall once he said (jokingly...I hope)..."you really don't want to marry her, you want to marry her car". Seeing how it was, at that time, a several year old Dodge Neon, I was disappointed he thought my standards were that low.:facepalm:rotflmao

Paul86

11-26-2009, 12:28 PM

Word.
My wife usually takes the high road, usually.

pit_s_xroad

11-26-2009, 12:29 PM

mine do come along very well with each other...

PIT...:bong

newking70

11-26-2009, 12:31 PM

it has something to do with oedipus. :messedup

megatonic

11-26-2009, 12:38 PM

...eeewww.

sodapopinski

11-26-2009, 12:55 PM

women...

J.T.

11-26-2009, 12:58 PM

What about your wife and your siblings wife?.....Me and my brother are in the middle of this one and prefer not to talk about them at all when we chat

CharAznable

11-26-2009, 01:17 PM

My wife and my mom get along great. My mom is the sweetest, easiest going person ever.

mark norwine

11-26-2009, 02:03 PM

My mom loves my wife more than she loves me. She told my wife that if we ever split up, she (wife) could live with them (my parents).

Go figure.

Joshlespaul1952

11-26-2009, 02:06 PM

Sorry for your troubles.

By the way -- Def Con 5 is the safest; Def Con 1 is the most dangerous.

louderock

11-26-2009, 02:17 PM

Some Pink Floyd for you:

Hush now baby, baby, don't you cry
Momma's gonna check out all your girlfriends for you
Momma won't let anyone dirty get through
Momma's gonna wait up until you get in
Momma will always find out where you've been
Momma's gonna keep Baby healthy and clean
Oooo Babe
Oooo Babe
Ooo Babe, you'll always be Baby to me

nitehawk55

11-26-2009, 02:45 PM

Seriously.....I have not met my youngest son's MIL I know if and when we do it's going to be a bad situation and I know my wife and I or both of us will come to blows as well as other family members . She is a total control freak who spoiled what would have been a normal family wedding for my son and her daughter into them just taking off to Mexico and getting married there to escape her .

Her picture is beside the words meddling , witch , psyco and bitch in the dictionary :hide

I am seeing some strangeness in my DIL too though so time is going to tell with this relationship .

mlongano

11-26-2009, 03:41 PM

I've been married for 37 years and my wife and I both get along fine with eachother's parents...I guess we're lucky...they are not the meddling types....

...I will say this however...if my mother ever gave my wife any grief I would immediately put my mother in her place...remember, you married your wife, not your mother.

If my mother didn't like it that would just be too bad for her. If she wanted to make an issue out of it, I'd be quite happy to sever that relationship until such time (if ever) that she wised up. Life is way too short for that BS.

Don A

11-26-2009, 03:55 PM

My wife and mother get along just fine. They're both reasonably stable people.

My wife does not get along with her own mother (neither does her sister). Luckily, she lives well over 1000 miles away!

The Golden Boy

11-26-2009, 04:11 PM

Chicks... can't hold their smoke... that's what it is...

newking70

11-26-2009, 04:14 PM

Chicks... can't hold their smoke... that's what it is...

:bong:bong:bong:bong

tone4days

11-26-2009, 05:08 PM

My mom loves my wife more than she loves me.
+1 - daughter she never had

whoofnagle

11-26-2009, 05:23 PM

Same boat here...

My mom loves my wife more than she loves me. She told my wife that if we ever split up, she (wife) could live with them (my parents).

Go figure.

Tonemeister69

11-26-2009, 05:24 PM

My wife and mother have a great relationship. Come to think of it, I might be getting a little jealous :D

soundscapes

11-26-2009, 05:51 PM

Things could be worse, watch the movie Laurel Canyon.

michael.e

11-26-2009, 05:59 PM

It has to be your job to lay it out to mom how it is going to be, an make them both chill. If mom stays chapped, it is her loss. If she is ok with that, well there are certainly bigger issues. Bottom line tho, it is your job to set the ground rules.

candh

11-26-2009, 06:14 PM

My mom and my wife get along great. Granted they only see each other for a few weeks every other year. My mother-in-law and I are a different story. :argue

Jiffy_Jeff

11-26-2009, 06:33 PM

Maybe its time for the Sumo Suits!

http://www.huntingdongardengames.co.uk/bouncy-castles-for-hire/sumo-suits.JPG

stratman34

11-26-2009, 06:37 PM

mom died when I was 10, so dont have to deal with it. But I can imagine it being stressful.

Same here.

BBender

11-26-2009, 06:41 PM

I thought I was going to see some kinky pictures....this thread sucks.

French Fry

11-26-2009, 06:48 PM

Hey it's good to hear some of you don't have to deal with this kind of situation.

It's funny, I keep running into people who are going through the same thing.

Yes, for the sake of the children, I'm firmly on my wife's side. Sucks for my mom as she's alone and lives for her only 2 grandchildren.

French Fry

11-26-2009, 06:49 PM

Things could be worse, watch the movie Laurel Canyon.

Yes, pretty much everything in life is worse than Kate Beckinsale ... to be honest I don't really remember anything else about that movie.

Rattles

11-26-2009, 07:25 PM

Knock on wood.....I get along great with my mother-in-law and my husband gets along great with my mom. And so far, I get along great with my son-in-law and my new daughter-in-law.

I've had a few issues with my MIL over the past 30 years, but we have learned to talk things out and move on....like mature adults should.

shredtrash

11-26-2009, 11:42 PM

I feel very fortunate to have avoided those issues. My mom and my wife get along well and I get along great with my mother-in-law. Whew!

bigdaddy

11-26-2009, 11:56 PM

I feel ya. There is only one solution to any mother-in-law problem:

http://weblogs.cw11.com/news/local/morningnews/blogs/baby.jpg

DGDGBD

11-27-2009, 08:16 AM

my wife and mom did not get along early in our relationship, but now they get along just fine. my wife and her family....now that's another story altogether! defcon 0 for many years.

JamesT

11-27-2009, 09:56 AM

What is a "defcon"?

DGDGBD

11-27-2009, 10:18 AM

"DEFCONs are matched to the situations of military severity. Standard peacetime protocol is DEFCON 5, descending in increasingly severe situations. DEFCON 1 represents expectation of actual imminent attack, and is not known to have ever been declared. During the Cold War (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_War), DEFCON 1 was feared because it would most likely precede an all-out nuclear war." - wikipedia

dbeeman

11-27-2009, 10:27 AM

My Mom, RIP, loved my wife. She gave her the OK from the first time they met...and she didn't do that for just anybody.

Flyin' Brian

11-27-2009, 10:33 AM

Neither of us had the opportunity to meet each others' parents before they died.

ML's daughter loves me and my sons love ML. Good enough.

cmatthes

11-27-2009, 11:09 AM

I guess I won the lottery on this one.

Couldn't have a better situation between my mother and my wife or a better Mother-In-Law.

Doesn't always work out for everybody though - not even in my immediate family.

TD_Madden

11-27-2009, 11:19 AM

John Thigpen

11-27-2009, 11:22 AM

My wife and my parents get along very well. There are probably two reasons for that:

1 - Marrying my wife produced children (two boys) at the ripe old ages of 47 and 50. My parents had given up, so my wife can do no wrong.

2 - My wife's mother died from breast cancer about six months after we got married. My wife was taking care of her in Alexandria, VA (during the sniper shootings!), and her mother demanded grandchildren, insisting that I fly there for Labor Day weekend to service her daughter. That one shot worked, and we were about 10 weeks pregnant when she died. My wife misses her mother terribly, so she's happy to have my mother to share motherhood with. Unfortunately, my parents are too old to be much help with the kids, other than spoiling them.

John

getbent

11-27-2009, 11:46 AM

you need to have the zoom H2 at the ready... when someone goes off... record them... wait one week. make it into an mp3. take all your pictures from the day.. make a slide show with the recording as the 'background music'... send a link to the offending person with the note "happy thanksgiving"

Say nothing else. no judgement, no commentary... let them hear themselves and soak it on in... people who are otherwise in control of their lives will adjust themselves.. folks who aren't will be upset, but then you'll know to marginalize them.

jnug

11-28-2009, 07:56 AM

My mom loves my wife more than she loves me. She told my wife that if we ever split up, she (wife) could live with them (my parents).

Go figure.

yeah my mom told my fiancee the same thing:thudthe real ballbuster was when dad agreed with her, he thought that would be a fine idea:crazyguy

FenderBigot

11-28-2009, 12:36 PM

I get along fine with my mother-in-law and my wife gets along fine with my mom. I am having sister-in-law issues on both sides. I can't handle how controlling my wife's sister is and my sister hates my wife.

The issue for me is that my sister sent me a note saying that she and I are "estranged" until further notice due to her not liking my wife (who I've been married to for almost 14 years and "with" for over 18)... Isn't that just a load of f'ing BS?!?!

So now this is becoming a major family issue for me because my little sister is fast closing in on 40, single and has no kids. She is displaying a mental unbalance towards my wife out of plain jealousy, since my wife has what she wants... meaning a happy marriage, two kids, a house and gets to be a stay-at-home wife/mother. She's starting to drag my mother, father and brothers into the whole thing... it's really sad.

But I like my wife's mother and my wife likes my mother! LOL

JamesT

11-28-2009, 06:14 PM

My mom and my wife adore each othere kinds sorta... My parents would let her move in (if they lived closer) if we got a divorce--- like mentioned above.... well...

my wife is always saying "OH MY GOD!" Her mom is always saying "Mon Dieu" my god in French. She is from France, but Italian... anyhoo.... last Memorial Day weekend we were visiting my parents way down south and she said it and my mom put her hands on her ears "DON"T TAKE THJE LORD"S NAME IN VANE!!!" She said that several times and the next day I was outside with my mom aqnd she asked me- Doesn't it bother you that she ia always taking the lord's name in vane.... My mom is old and does not remember it, buit my wife has not forgotton it....

Teleplayer

11-28-2009, 06:15 PM

Whoever said, "You don't marry the family" is full of $#!t........

Bo Faulkner

11-28-2009, 07:47 PM

been there done that... things are ok these days but there have been some periods of months were they didnt speak

lakehaus

11-28-2009, 07:55 PM

What the #$@%# is it about wife and mother in law relationships?
:facepalm :nuts

Well, your wife did take your mom's little boy away from her...

Twangmaster

11-29-2009, 12:17 PM

before you throw yourself in the middle of that one... remember this one basic rule

"Do Not argue with Women or Old Men.... You Will Lose!"

Polynitro

11-29-2009, 12:36 PM

I though this thread was, "My Wife is my Mom"

Kaji13

11-29-2009, 12:39 PM

Well, your wife did take your mom's little boy away from her...
.
:facepalm:nuts

French Fry

11-29-2009, 01:19 PM

Well, your wife did take your mom's little boy away from her...

Yeah I have to wonder if there is truth there, conscious or subconscious.

Who do I need to talk to about that? Got Freud's number?

French Fry

11-29-2009, 01:22 PM

before you throw yourself in the middle of that one... remember this one basic rule

"Do Not argue with Women or Old Men.... You Will Lose!"

Well, unfortunately I'm right in the middle of this one... didn't mean to be, and I don't know why I should be, but my mom won't communicate with my wife at this point.

My mother is a piece of work.

There are no good solutions to wife vs. mother issues of this kind. none.