Monkey NUTS!!! My trip to the zoo (and a short pitstop in hell itself)...

[Smgbad]

THE ZOO:

Soooo.... my wife and I decided to take a grand aventure to the NC Zoo in Asheboro today, and adventure we FOUND!

After a 2 hour car ride, I stepped out at the zoo into the 100+ degree heat of the afternoon. To make matters even more pleasureable, it was very humid too... It was quickly decided I should NOT have worn a black shirt and jeans. The sun was beating down so hard on us as we walked I'd have settled for a Speedo to be honest. We must've walked 7-10 miles at least in it, just to get through the whole African exhibit. Where the heck is a Segway when you need one?

So I haven't been to the zoo in 20+ years, and the animals (on the African side) were miserable. They were all either passed out from the heat or picking bugs off eachother and eating them.





We had loads of fun though... I got my wife to do some of the Wild Kingdom Yoga posted on the signs as we walked the trails. My favorite was her Lion stance!



We had a great time watching the chimpanzees in their habitat, and when we were heading on thats when I saw them... MONKEY NUTS!





Did ya see them? They are right here!



I also had fun making passerby think I was getting attacked by giant killer dung beetles,



trying to ride my very first aardvark,



and going and standing in the bushes and looking over my shoulder to see what kind of looks I got...



Once we reached the end of the African exhibits, I was going to be all manly and attempt the suicide mission of doing another 5 miles or so of walking to see all the Norh American critters, but my wife said she really just wanted the AC of the car... I love the way she thinks!



So we get back to the car finally, and start to head back towards home.

SIDE STORY (PRE-ZOO):

On the way to Asheboro, we passed through a town called Siler City, NC. Being the ghosthunting nerd I've aspired to be ever since childhood, I remembered there was a place called the Devil's Tramping Ground somewhere near there, although I'd never been. I told my wife all about it on the trip to the zoo that morning, and she said if we passed by it we could go. I knew rom the stories, finding it was like finding a needle in a haystack if you'd never been.

The story goes something like this... Since the 1800's the devil or a demonic entity is said to stomp around a circular clearing in the woods, plotting new and interesting evils he can uleash on humanity. Nothing will grow (not grass, not plants, not even seeds you plant). Also if you camp out overnight or leave ANYTHING inside the circle, the next morning you will find yourself (and tent) outside the circle and any items you've left violently thrown outside of it. The devil is FAR too busy and pissed off to have you cluttering his pacing circle. Seriously, this place is listed as one of the top 10 scary places in the USA on some lists I've seen.

I SOOO wanted to go...

FAST FORWARD TO THE TRIP HOME:

So the stupid GPS decided to take us a completely different way home, dashing all dreams of my finding the Prince of All That Is Unholy's Pacing Area. Or so I thought...

Turns out it's harder to hold 3 large bottles of water in than I had thought. I had to pee so bad I thought the back of my teeth were going to flood. I had to stop. I pulled off into a gas station in the rural part of the middle of nowhere called Harper's Crossing. Upon my glorious exit from their restroom, the beautimus farmer's daughter behind the register asked how my day was going as she could see I was DRENCHED in sweat.

I told her about the zoo trip, and how I really wanted to check out that Devil's Tramping Ground spot, but I had a retarded mentally handicapped GPS. She said, "this is your lucky day", and pointed out the bay window at the front of the store. Apparently all I had to do was turn down the road by the Goodyear sign not 200 yards away... Devils Tramping Ground Rd. OH YEAH! The hunt for the truth is back on!

THE DEVILS TRAMPING GROUND:

So about 5 minutes later I've found the old rusty silo and the ominous cell tower that the farmer's daughter had told me to look for. My wife and I parked and got out, not knowing what lie ahead. It was completely unmarked, and the entrance path was just a larger than average dirt shoulder off to the side of the road you could tell many many cars had stopped at before.



We walked over the dirt trench and followed the little path going directly to this clearing.



At first I thought surely this wasn't it as there was another path behind this little clearing. So I gather my nerves and my wife and I walk about 1/2 mile down this odd winding path into the woods.

Just then clouds formed overhead and there was lightning in the distance. I made the decision that since neither of us had ever seen the actual DTG we should Google a pic of it on her phone. Turns out it WAS the original clearing, and we were 1/2 mile back into no-man's land with a storm coming. To make matters worse, on the walk back through the dense forest along that narrow trail I started hearing things. STRANGE things, almost like whispers. Brambles be damned, it was definitely time to hightail it back to the clearing.

Upon re-arriving at the true Devil's Tramping Ground, it really was kind of disappointing to look at. There was wood from a fire in the circle, which I'm guessing had been there a little while (ie: not thrown outside the circle).

Then I noticed that all around the circle, there was litter (broken glass, Doritos bags, bottles), but inside the circle there was NONE. OK... kinda weird. But then THIS happened. I decided to have my wife take a picture of me inside the circle.



A clap of thunder came with a flash. She took another picture, and LOOK!!!



I WAS STANDING OUTSIDE THE CIRCLE!!!

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OK. Ok. You caught me. That didn't actually happen. My wife and I were getting worried that the thunderstorm would be directly over us in a minute or two, so we left for the car. As we got in the Jeep, chain lightning was ripping across the sky.

While nothing supernatural may have actually occured while we were there (except for the creepy whispering noises in the woods), I truly enjoyed finally visiting the site of one of NC's most famous legends. My wife and I headed home, but kept a careful eye out for "Satan's Hot Dog Stand". We were starving!

[MrTAteMyBalls]

cool story, bro.

No...really. Looks like a fun day.

[ford]

The important thing is you had fun and took plenty of pictures.

[Rattles]

You have to visit the zoo on an early spring or fall day....otherwise you will sweat to death! Been there, done that, and didn't buy a black t-shirt!

If you are interested in taking 'day trips' you need to visit some of the pottery places and also the Town Creek Indian Mound. We bought a beautiful vase made with crystals and the Indian Mound was also pretty neat.

(Neat thread too.....enjoyed the pictures!)

[hank57]

Best story on Tgp today in my opinion. But I also like reading the cereal box too. I appreciate you taking a chance wife your life for a good story. Now, tell us about the hot dog stand. Bbwwhhaa hhhaahh kitchywah!

[Fastermouse]

Originally Posted by hank57

Best story on Tgp today in my opinion. !

I agree. As a NC Ghost stories aficionado i would love to go tho DTG although my limited research tells me that where you went wasn't the original DTG. I think that it is a place built up on the legend.

But nevermind that. The voices you heard may have been in your head, but who cares. You had an adventure. And you and your wife had a great time. Kids go to Disneyland while their parents complain about parking. Adults go on adventures.

[Travst]

Great stories and pics. I had a good laugh.

[Tonekat]

One of the most entertaining travel stories I've seen on here!

[Teleplayer]

Let's cut to the chase. Not many people get to ride an aardvark. Well done mang!

And the next time somebody answers your question with a response of: "Does a monkey have nuts?????" Well, you'll know the answer.....definitively.

[scottlr]

That was completely enjoyable! Thanks!

[hi-fi-dave]

Originally Posted by Smgbad

THE ZOO:

So I haven't been to the zoo in 20+ years, and the animals (on the African side) were miserable. They were all either passed out from the heat or picking bugs off eachother and eating them.

Hummmm......it looks like the Lion wants his belly scratched.

I bet he would have given you a loving lick and a playful nibble. In fact, I bet all of them would have joined in to show their appreciation and invited you to dinner as a special guest.



I'm afraid you really missed an opportunity to make some new friends very happy.

[sausagefingers]

That was pretty good. I liked the pic of you off in the bushes at the zoo.

[i8guitar]

Thanks for the story! Does your wife know you posted pictures of her on the interwebz?

[Bob Longo]

Funny story! You killed me pointing to the monkey nuts! Great job!

[Swain]

Great story. Loved it!


RIDE THE AARDVARK!!!!!