"How to Land Your Kid in Therapy"

[Tonekat]

Originally Posted by Glass Onion

(yes I am enjoying my summer)

This is right on the money and half the ids I get are so over parented it is pathetic.

Freudian slip?

[Glass Onion]

Thank you TONECAT. That made my day. Yes it might have been unintentional but right on the money none the less. That is awesome.

[tone4days]

my wife and i worry about this and are probably guilty of some elements of it ... we observe a lot of other folks parenting the peers of our teen sons who are making a lot more serious mistakes with way more negative consequences ... but we still try to be very reflective in order to avoid some of these pitfalls

just this weekend we had a conversation where i shared something i had read (and concurred with) about a commencement address speaker who opined that she wished jefferson had use the phrase 'life, liberty, and the pursuit of meaningfulness' , or 'life, liberty, and the pursuit of integrity', instead of the phrase 'life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness' ... much hilarity ensued as my wife replied that the speaker was an idiot because everyone knows that if you ask any mom what they want for their kid, they'd say 'for them to be happy'

i guess that's why they make moms and dads ... hopefully, we have complimentary skills to impart

[Gas-man]

Perhaps it is more likely the modern practice of throwing kids in day care at 3 months of age for 8-10 hours a day that is causing problems for them later in life?

Nahhh...couldn't be. No one is going to give up their lifestyle.

[Fred Farkus]

Originally Posted by Gas-man

Perhaps it is more likely the modern practice of throwing kids in day care at 3 months of age for 8-10 hours a day that is causing problems for them later in life?

Nahhh...couldn't be. No one is going to give up their lifestyle.

People have been doing that for a longggggg time. Much longer than the issue discussed in that article.

[wstsidela]

I think my mom beat me with a child psychology book once.

[zul]

Its not all that bad. These 'anxieties' are normal for young adults. Psychologists might want it 'treated' since it is their vocation. Nothing wrong about discussing said topics as adults, but it should not be blown out of proportion too. It is akin to treating doubt, helplessness, envy, jealousy, hubris and the like. These life elements are part and parcel of an adult life. Not every 'problem' needs to be treated in a clinical environment by trained professionals.

The funny thing is that the type of parents the article is highlighting will probably 'rush' to deal with this as soon as they finish reading it an apply the same methods the article is renoucing. "Oh, honey, you're not entirely happy in your life? What did I do, or not do that was wrong? How can I fix it?".

Please do not liken it to negligent or abusive parenting; 'tiger mom'ism or 'exceptionalism'. Like a previous poster pointed out, attentiveness does not always equate to helicoptering.

My wife and I, both certified teachers, can merely do our best. I trust her maternal instincts as much as I trust our collective studied education on these matters. We try to use logic and reason with our two boys, 7 and 9, since birth and although it can be fatiguing most times, especially during their formative years, the dividends are starting to pay of as they start to utilize these skills. They have grown up surrounded by it even prior to them acquiring any semblence of either.

But they wear no armor, do not reside in cocoons and display the normal cuts and bruises life dishes out periodically. They don't love us all the time either, trust me on this.

[JamesT]

Well, I won't bore y'all with the details, but there is this resort place in the DC area where people like Senators wives, pro football players, and spooks go to rest and relax and the motto there is.... "It is never too late to have a happy childhood".

[Gas-man]

Originally Posted by Fred Farkus

People have been doing that for a longggggg time. Much longer than the issue discussed in that article.

It has only been fairly recent that most people adopted (pun) the model of daycare for kids and both parents grabbing for the dough with both hands.

[Fred Farkus]

Originally Posted by Gas-man

It has only been fairly recent that most people adopted (pun) the model of daycare for kids and both parents grabbing for the dough with both hands.

"Fairly recent"???

Been going on for at least around 30 yrs from what I've seen.

Besides, the issues mentioned in the article do not logically follow from kids being in day care. "Correlation does not imply causation"...

[Bobby D]

Originally Posted by epluribus

Fosse-natin'. Gearheads and modelers take note (me included ):



Alfred Eisenstadt, the Life Magazine photographer, is said to have demanded that his students master the 50mm lens and Tri-X B&W film before venturing into the bottomless pit of color and gadgets. I suspect he'd be wagging his finger at me...

--Ray

that's uncanny.......exactly what my photography teacher in HS made me do.

nothing but a Canon AE-1 and PLUS X or TRI X -- and the standard 50mm lense.....

[Sandy Cheeks]

Originally Posted by wstsidela

I think my mom beat me with a child psychology book once.

Early on, my wife got a book called "Kids Are Worth It". I can only say that name through clenched teeth,

[lpfella]

I don't know, I find nothing new or great about this particular psychotherapist's recent revelation. This type of thing has been studied to a great extent since the early 60's if not before.

In fact, I would never even go see this therapist if she never had thoughts about this before. To me it is someone too stuck within the confines of "psychotherapy" and didn't take the time to allow for other schools of thought in the psychological world. Last person I want helping me.

Martin Seligman pretty much demonstrated the cycle and processes that lead to this type of affect since the early 60's with his learned helplessness research and how people develop their explanatory style.

Sorry I can't partake in the excitement over the article, but rather, I find it a bit worrisome that a clinical psychotherapist is just embracing this type of thought in their career.