We're now empty nesters

[skydog]

And I don't like it. My son moved to Brooklyn to take a drumming job today, and I miss him already! The house seems empty. I'm off work today but the wife had to work. Who else has gone through this? I feel so stupid because nothing happened to him or anything, and he's eager to take on this next step in his life. Time marches on I guess. I feel like there was a lot more I wanted to teach him but he never really took to my "outdoor" activities. He's just always, always loved music. Anyone here into the NYC rock scene?

[lcjc800]

you're gonna love this.......

[Jarrett]

I'm going through a pre empty nest deal right now. Been a single parent all the way through and my daughter is nearing 17, she isn't interested in being home anymore. Between school, her job, her hobby and her friends, she just uses this place as a bed really.

I had been sort of prepping for her to be gone after her senior year, but kinda feeling it now. Giving an opportunity to see what post single parenthood life is going to look like for me.

[Jetrow]

It's an adjustment, but now you can get back to you. The you you were before all the kids. Take the time and find the way forward with all those little things you had to step back from or put away because of your responsibility.

Don't let yourself sit and brood over his growing up though. Soon enough there will be grandkids so make it count.

[skydog]

Thanks, Jetrow! I appreciate the kind thought!

[KeithC]

All our kids are moved out now and I don't think we mind too much now!

But one daughter is just down the street with her husband and 3 of our grandkids so it's not quite the same. Other daughter and our son are both within 10 minutes of us too.

I think you will adjust though.
Truthfully I don't think I would be as good with it if they were all out of town/state and I couldn't or didn't see them pretty often. Especially with the health scare our daughter is going through.

+1 on the grandkids thing too

[defcrew]

Sort of there with you, skydog. Both my kids have moved out "permanently" in the last six months. Definitely a seismic shift. The amount of laundry has been cut to a fraction and the water bill is halk what it was but the house is also very quiet with two bedrooms empty and rarely even entered. I do find myself wondering what to do with some idle hours now. Lots of guitar noodling, etc., but not the same as just sitting around and chatting with the kids. Kind of happens gradually though the final step is a bit of a "shocker." You know, "Wow, so that's it, huh?"

[Midnight Lady]

I hear you and I understand. It hit me a LOT harder than I thought it was going to.... I felt so empty!

I became an empty nester during our two years in Australia. Six months in, my daughter decided she needed to go back to Canada, so she did. I didn't see her again for a full year. It was awful. I still remember going and sitting on her bed just to be close to her stuff.

It's a big transition and once you're through it, life gets even better. Have a "date night" with your wife. Fool around in the living room (bet it's been a long time since you've been able to do that).

And BE PROUD!!!! You have raised a child that is off into the world pursuing his dreams. You've done a good job. (If he was taking up residence in your basement, that would be a whole different thing.)

[chrisr777]

Just threw my son out last weekend and we have already been to see a movie!!!!!

Wow, its amazing what you are going to have time for.

[RupertB]

We sent our only daughter off to college two months ago. Yeah, it is a very strange feeling. I can see her just about any time I want as she is only 45 minutes away but not having her at home regularly has taken some getting used to.

MrsB & I are enjoying the "just us" time and I've started playing with another band as well as a new amp re-building project. Still, I miss her. She & I would spend hours hiking around the local state park, talking about books, music, etc.

On the plus side, she is doing great & very involved in clubs & other extracurriculars.

[defcrew]

Originally Posted by chrisr777

Just threw my son out last weekend and we have already been to see a movie!!!!!

Wow, its amazing what you are going to have time for.

Thanks for the levity. That made me LOL.

[lspaulsp]

You can do ieeeeeeeeeeet! You can do ieeeeet alllll night looooooong!

[MarkL8]

It take some adjusting, used to kid my boy about him finally moving out and how mom and I were gonna party LOL.....being big big badass I am I iteared up when he left. Fast forward two years and he and his wife bought a house right around the corner. Thats a good thing. BTW Living room and kitchen or anywhere ya want sex can be very fun LOL. Oh and his room is now my studio/office...there are perks!

[defcrew]

There's a car compnay out now with a pretty funny campaign based around the solipsistic children worrying about what their parents are doing without them. My fave is when the kids says, " I mean, I'm their only child.....besides my sister."

[Madison]

I'm a new empty nester as well, but things are working out good for us. Our daughter lives 45 minutes east from us, and son an hour away west. So the house is a bit more quiet, but they come home or we go see them every 2-4 weeks. My wife struggles a little with it, but it's been good for me. It makes it SO much easier knowing they are in school working on their education!