Bedroom player(s)

Discussion in 'Effects, Pedals, Strings & Things' started by Larry Esposito, Feb 19, 2019.

  1. Daytona57

    Daytona57 Member

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    I too, used to have a hard time finding people to jam guitar with until I learned to play the drums.

    Now people call me, to play with them.

    YMMV
     
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  2. LikeAMotherF

    LikeAMotherF Supporting Member

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    I live in NYC, where there's literally millions of people, and I can't tell you how hard it has been to try and put a band together. I tried Craigslist, going to shows to meet other players, all of the normal routes. The only way I was able to join/make a band was totally happenstance- I was working at a bar, and ended up saddling up to the same guy a couple times; we get to talking music, and it turns out we love most of the second stuff. So he says, 'what do you play? we should jam'. Turns out he's an amazing drummer. That's a couple of years ago- maybe 4 now?- and besides being in two bands together in that time, he has also become my best friend that I've met in my adult life.

    So, basically, looking and trying really hard never paid off for me. It was just pure, dumb luck.
     
  3. sertshark

    sertshark Member

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    Finding people who play music isn't too difficult. Finding people who are dedicated to playing is much, much harder. I think it would be worth it to put up an add somewhere, or even on Craigslist, maybe just to say you are looking to jam with nothing too serious. Many people have jobs and other responsibilities and would like to just get together to jam without obligation. You never know what might happen. If nothing else, playing with other people is a lot of fun (sometimes even MORE fun because you aren't a "band" and you're just getting together for a couple hours to share music).

    Cool bedroom by the way.
     
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  4. Moody Tuner

    Moody Tuner Member

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    Yep, that’s the grind, but it’s worth it when it works out. It takes a combination of persistence, confidence and open submission to the process... care and let go at the same time. Music is too important to take seriously.
     
  5. moemoe6434

    moemoe6434 Member

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    Do I see a Carl Thompson..... or two?
     
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  6. run23

    run23 Supporting Member

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    I live in NYC and am super jealous of people that can crank an amp at home.

    Yeah- finding like-minded people to play with can be really tough. For my current band I got super lucky on Craigslist and just happened to respond to an ad and met people that I clicked with musically and are on the same page as me.

    It’s especially tough as an ‘older’ (in my 40s) player as I have no interest in doing classic rock covers, which I found a lot of players in my situation want to do. I still want to approach music like I did in my 20s (with the added maturity of having some taste and being able to play much better) - basically not being fenced in by needing to play a certain way because that's the way Clapton, Tom Petty, SRV or whoever approached playing and song-writing. If something sounds good it shouldn't be off limits. Not to knock the classic rock approach, but it's not at all why I play music. And if I were going to knock the classic rock approach, it sometimes bugs me that after a certain age non-professional musicians turn super conservative and don't want to play around with trying something musically new.

    Which is why bedroom playing can be interesting - you're free to come up with and play whatever you want.
     
  7. No_Stairway

    No_Stairway Supporting Member

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    Kinda brings new meaning to banging the headboard

    If I could just comvince the wife to sleep on the sofa (duvan, davenport, couch depending on your location) I could rock out!

    I'm a spare bedroom rocker myself but actually working my chops to join some open jams, got serious about guitar about a year ago. I've always played bass but with guitar I have the freedom to play what I want, no setlist I put together would draw a crowd but I'm ok with that, I play what I want.

    Got me a Strat and a Dual HB Schecter, Peavey mh and 12" cab and more pedals than I can power at once.
     
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  8. MoonshineMan

    MoonshineMan Member

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    I’m technically a bedroom player for 4-5mo at a stretch when I’m working on a ship.
    I’m just gonna say it: It SUCKS playing electric guitar by myself. Even with a looper. I need a band setting or just give me my ukulele and I’ll be happier. I only bring my electric (and a Zoom G3Xn) so I’m not totally retarded at guitar when I come home and get back on stage.

    If I only played at home, I’d just play acoustic. (Which I prefer, anyway...)

    This certainly may not be true for everyone (haven’t read the thread), and that’s cool.
     
  9. Suarkttam

    Suarkttam Silver Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    Played in bands for years during and after college...now, I have a career outside music, and three kids...and this corner of my bedroom is my meditative place...where I play for myself, and occasionally record for friends who are still in the industry. I play everyday...and nothing washes away the day (or simply improves one) like an hour in this corner...

    [​IMG]
     
  10. LikeAMotherF

    LikeAMotherF Supporting Member

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    Man, if you live in NYC and that's the corner of your bedroom, you definitely made the right career choice. (As opposed to music. And as long as you value stability and comfort and other things that come with money.)
     
  11. Suarkttam

    Suarkttam Silver Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    Yeah. I do ok. And am extremely fortunate to express my other creative side as an Art Director. Something I’ve been doing for 20 years now.
     
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  12. desire machine

    desire machine Member

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    playing music is definitely a meditative way to relax. It's a bit weird some of the comments complaining about people playing in their homes.. I mean painting a picture or riding a bike are both good healthy hobby to relax.... doesn't mean you plan on becoming a famous artist or a olympian ... or that you're a loser if you do those things by yourself with no delusions of it going anywhere. I mean music I do feel is largely meant to be shared either by playing w/ others or performing for others ... but there's def value in just doing it to relax.
     
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  13. cosmicevan

    cosmicevan Member

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    So much this. At 40 with a pair of kids, I play almost every day and at this point the kids like to get involved every now and then which I always encourage. It's a real nice thing to be able to enjoy music as a release from the daily grind and not have music be the stress of the daily grind. I like being able to afford the gear I always dreamed of playing and also be able to afford to have the luxury of time to enjoy the gear...had I thrown my all into playing music, at best I could have hoped to have made a reasonable splash in a band that successfully gigs small clubs around the country and earned a living comparable to what a recent college grad can make after working hard for a few years. But to support a family on that would be hard. Sometimes you can enjoy the dream and make it last a lot longer by not trying to chase it as your reality. I haven't had the same difficulty in finding like minded musicians to play with - sure we aren't working on a setlist, we are all just of the mindset of having fun with this.
     
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  14. valvestate

    valvestate Member

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    Hmmm I in my late 30s... getting old. I wonder if I still have a band at that time I reach 40 or if my wife will still allow me to make me play the guitar, making noise. :confused:

    fear of the unknown
     
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  15. Moody Tuner

    Moody Tuner Member

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    I can relate. 1 kid. Play everyday (I’m a better musician than I was when I could play for 8 hours a day). I can afford the gear I want and play in 2 drama free bands.
     
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  16. Moody Tuner

    Moody Tuner Member

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    The unknown is something to embrace, not fear. There’s a lot that’s negotionable in my relationship, but playing music is a foundational part of who I am as a person, so it’s off the negotiating table. If I was ever presented with an ultimatum, our next step would be how to complete the divorce as smoothly as possible. I’m not in such a situation though, and am appreciative that my self expression is supported by my partner.
     
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  17. Riffa

    Riffa Member

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    Damn I've fallen asleep like that a few times myself
     
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  18. No_Stairway

    No_Stairway Supporting Member

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    Man you said it... I have this 60-90min period when I get home from work that my wife is still working (at home). I hop into the music room and I reemrge fresh and relaxed.
     
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  19. run23

    run23 Supporting Member

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    If it makes you feel better, I’m in my 40s (hard for me to believe, but I guess almost at at late 40s) and I’m playing more than ever in a new-ish band. Oddly enough I have more time now to dedicate to playing than in my 30s, or am at least better at managing my time to make room for what’s important. I mean, I have much more control over my time now in my career, and social engagements tend to be much more planned as friends get older and need to manage kids etc.

    Plus, not to get all pseudo-heavy, when I really see that I’m well into the second half of life and not going to live forever, doing what I love takes priority - no excuses anymore for not living life the way I want - to me that’s the one the marks of a ‘succesful’ life. And my wife knows that playing with people makes me happy and when I’m happy I’m a better husband - or at least that’s what I’m telling her (-;.
     
    Last edited: Mar 2, 2019
  20. Kevy_Metal

    Kevy_Metal Member

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    I'm in my late 40s, been playing since the mid-80s whether on my own in the bedroom or with various bands. I've found that regardless of the setup, as long as I'm happy, I'll always play. My gear is in my bedroom and ready to be used when I want to play.

    Growing up, I was very lucky to get thrust into playing with other older/experienced musicians very early and learned a lot at the time, even though I was just happy to get to jam with people who wanted me there. After a solid run, I probably spent at least 10 years without playing with anyone due to moving to a new city and going to school/getting into my current career.

    Once I was able to connect with people in my industry who were also musicians, I did some jamming, but eventually (and without expecting to) shifted away from the electric and was obsessed with the acoustic. So I was spent 7-8 years writing and singing, exploring a whole other side that had never been tapped before. Eventually, I reintroduced the electric to my playing and have been able to balance those two sides, playing originals and covers with one group while writing my own acoustic songs for myself.

    If the band thing goes away, I'll always have my own things to work on and my bedroom will still be my main songwriting studio.
     
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