Colonoscopy

Discussion in 'The Pub' started by whoofnagle, May 2, 2016.

  1. whoofnagle

    whoofnagle Gold Supporting Member

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    A buddy is getting ready for a colonoscopy and is a bit fearful of the process. Several years ago there was a thread here that detailed in a very humorous way about what to expect. Does anybody remember the thread? I have search, but no luck. If I remember correctly there were references to vintage cars, O rings, etc...
     
  2. AA864

    AA864 Member

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    The prep is worse than the procedure. Be at home near your bathroom.
     
  3. Flying Panda

    Flying Panda Member

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    Dave Barry wrote a humorous piece years ago about "the procedure". That might be what you're looking for.
     
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  4. Jay K

    Jay K Member

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    Can't help with finding the previous thread. However, there is nothing to worry about unless the doctor shakes like he has advanced Parkinson's. Rather safe procedure. The only real negative is the preparation--drinking some hideous liquid and then spending most of your time on the toilet for hours on end--is rather bothersome but necessary
     
  5. Flying Panda

    Flying Panda Member

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  6. cogan

    cogan Silver Supporting Member

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    You can have an interesting round of "To Tell the Truth Russian Roulette"... walk into the office with 5 friends, simultaneously face the wall, and drop your shorts. The trick to the game is that the other five guys have to have one in the chamber. Works great for the prostate DRE too.

    "Your move, doctor."

    EDIT: I suppose I'll need to clarify for this crowd that "one in the chamber" means "a poop in the chute". See how eager he is to figure out who's all clear.
     
    Last edited: May 3, 2016
  7. Rezin

    Rezin Member

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    I've had two colonoscopies now, ten years apart. The prep isn't as bad as it once was, and there are lots of medical procedures that are worse. Once he's on the table, he won't feel much and will remember less. I know of one person who was found to have lots of pre-cancerous polyps. If she hadn't had the procedure, she'd be dead now. Colonoscopies are far better than colon cancer, believe me.
     
  8. DETRONATI

    DETRONATI Silver Supporting Member

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  9. sanrico

    sanrico Member

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    This is it, completely. You take the laxatives, and you hit the bathroom until there's nothing left. It's not difficult, but it's uncomfortable. The procedure is beyond easy after that.

    This is my biggest advice: choose the first meal carefully after the procedure. You're working with a very empty system and for some reason, the first meal wants to react much like the last one you had. Go easy on yourself.

    The first time I had a colonoscopy, on the way home, I was starving, so I had my wife stop at the local greasy burger joint, where I got a cheeseburger with green chile, large fries and a soda.

    Within a couple of hours, I was wishing I had a popsicle.
     
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  10. FenderTone

    FenderTone Gold Supporting Member

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    I had a colonoscopy three years ago and as other people say, the prep is the bummer.

    My strategy next time is to buy a gallon of Vaseline and use it in bathroom visits. By the last two hours of the prep the pain from all the prior wiping is not a good thing. I'm trying Vaseline.
     
  11. Totally Bored

    Totally Bored Member

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    The best part is all the stupid stuff you say when you wake up and you don't remember saying any of it.

    Mrs. Totally Bored was so embarrassed:dude
     
  12. WhalingStories

    WhalingStories Member

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    I got to watch the video feed of my own procedure and it was AWESOME

    EDIT: to clarify, I had a sigmoidoscopy, which is similar but does not go as deep as a colonoscopy. BUT, it was pretty damn deep as far as I was concerned. I couldn't believe how deep they kept going, and going, and going...
     
    Last edited: May 3, 2016
  13. FenderTone

    FenderTone Gold Supporting Member

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    I remember watching the video of much of mine as well. It's uncommon to remember because the typical twilight cocktail contains the date rape drug which wipes memory.
     
  14. WhalingStories

    WhalingStories Member

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    I have to amend my statement: it was a sigmoidoscopy that I had. The didn't give me anything, at least as far as I can remember. Or maybe the cocktail made me forget that I had a cocktail, but that would be about the only detail I don't remember. I remember it was strange how they were able to take samples of my organ lining with these little pincers built into the end of the scope. It was intense but I did not feel anything from the pricks and yanks, only from the occasional e-brake turn on the tighter bends.
     
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  15. DGTCrazy

    DGTCrazy Moderator de Emporio Staff Member

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    Here's the thing about the Colonoscopy process; you don't really need it....unless the FIT test picks something up. Yes...some of you are ready to flame me, but I recently found out a very interesting fact about it from my doctor, compared to having the simple Fecal, (FIT), test conducted. While the Colonoscopy can pick up on signs of Cancer earlier than the Fecal test, the surgical process is exactly the same, and the outcomes are equal, since the FIT is administered once a year for 10 years. Anyway, here's some good reading: http://www.healthline.com/health-ne...her-effective-tests-for-colon-cancer-032015#4
     
  16. mattball826

    mattball826 Member

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    Good you are doing this procedure. It really is needed even as a marker for any progression or potential for disease.

    Procedure is easy. Don't eat much 48 hrs prior, nothing for the last 24.. Drink the prep fluids, empty out. You get an IV, sedated and wakeup farting. That's it.

    My brother had what he thought was IBS or occasional diverticulitis. He never had it checked out but dealt with it for several years. When he finally got checked he was stage 4 colorectal and liver cancer. He is 47 now and fighting for each day. Made it beyond the 12 mos they initially gave him, but he has a young son and is hanging on and fighting with all he has..

    Colorectal cancers don't always have any signs until after progression.

    DO this procedure
     
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  17. FenderTone

    FenderTone Gold Supporting Member

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    That's interesting but I'd had the fecal smears and there was never an indication of a problem.

    And yet when I had my colonoscopy I watched the doctor coral with the loop gizmo and snip off a polyp. The polyps develop into cancer and so I'm happy the doctor got that one.
     
  18. Sidney Vicious

    Sidney Vicious Member

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    The worst part was the liquid you have to drink - that stuff is foul!
     
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  19. Judge Smails

    Judge Smails Member

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    Just had one yesterday. Piece of cake,like others said ,the crap you have to drink is the worst.Besides the taste,the amount you have to drink is ridiculous. They will knock you out and you will wake up when it's over.
     
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