Ever try and watch tv with a dementia patient ?

Discussion in 'The Pub' started by mango, Feb 22, 2015.

  1. mango

    mango Member

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    Every show,saw it yesterday.Even the news .

    Even if they weren't here yesterday.:bonk

    Horrible disease,and woefully misunderstood.

    Makes for some good one-liners though.

    "Say what you want about the Nazis,they sure were sharp dressers !":tapedshut
     
  2. Gibson 1964

    Gibson 1964 Member

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    In my psych rotation for nursing school, yup.

    I think dementia is my #1 fear. Mostly I have dealt with late stage non-verbal patients with dementia. Not fun.
     
  3. lefort_1

    lefort_1 Nuzzled Firmly Betwixt Gold Supporting Member

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    I get to talk dementia patients thru all kinds of dental work including extractions, bone reduction surgeries, etc.
    Never not new.
    Sometimes, you just continue with their stream of consciousness, other times you gotta pull back to reality for your own sake.

    But it's always interesting and revealing, as they have no filters.

    Smile and nod; always a good answer.
     
  4. Cal Webway

    Cal Webway Member

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    worked inpatient psych, even forensic psych for 10 yrs
    !!!


    .
     
  5. Carlo

    Carlo Member

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    Mom is 91, in a nursing home and has dementia. She's in upstate NY, I'm in DC. I call her every night - when she is in the moment and lucid I am thankful - but there are times when I just don't know what to expect.
    I see she is living in different time periods and I just go with it. When I get off the phone, I am destroyed, feeling helpless that though she took such good care of me, I can't do a damn thing to chase the monsters away for her. I am crushed.
    When I visit her, she hardly wants to be bothered - when I drive back to DC and talk on the phone she wants to know when I am coming up to visit. When I tell her we just spent a week together, she has no recollection of me being there.
    When she is not responsive to me when I visit, I call her on my cell phone, stabbing right in front of her - she then talks to me on the phone without a problem. Hang up the phone, she doesn't know I'm there.
    She has developed physical actions like spitting which she never did.
    I can't get many answers from the nurses there - so thanks for reading this - and please feel free to PM if you can tell me anything that might help me cope with having to face the day when ...well you know.
     
  6. Carlo

    Carlo Member

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    typo last post - standing right in front her.....auto correct had me stabbing!
     
  7. John Coloccia

    John Coloccia Cold Supporting Member

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    Grandmother went with Alzheimer's a few years back. She was a tough old broad from Italy. Lost several children due to illness, raised several children on her own (including my mom), dragged them here on the boat and settled in New York. She retired at 65, got bored and went back to work. She worked at a second career as a seamstress until she was 90 or so. She had to stop when she missed her ride home (never learned to drive) and we found her wandering around downtown Yonkers completely lost and confused.

    In the end, she still recognized me as someone she loved, but as a infant would recognize family. She like stuffed animals and her blanket. I hope that if I ever get like this, someone will have the good sense to park me in a home and just forget about me, so that they remember me for who I really was.
     
  8. Jp2558

    Jp2558 Member

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    My MIL had Alzheimer's, and two of her sisters did too. My wife and her sisters (and myself) fear the future. I don't have any answers other than to say you are not alone in your struggle. Hang in there, do what you feel is the right thing, as there are no right answers.
     
  9. kcprogguitar

    kcprogguitar Member

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    Been there with family.

    Bald tires on ice. No traction.
     
  10. mc5nrg

    mc5nrg Supporting Member

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    Here is my condensed advice for folks dealing with Alzheimer or dementia sufferers. Ixnay on questions. Hard to do since asking questions is a big part of normal conversation but counterproductive in these situations.
     
  11. Bassomatic

    Bassomatic Silver Supporting Member

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    Yeah, occasionally on the dementia unit.
     
  12. Funky Chicken

    Funky Chicken Member

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    Dear old Dad died in 2011. Spent the last two years of his life in a stepped care facility, the last 6 months in a lockdown after he choked a woman in the dining room and escaped out a window. This led to a week in the state mental hospital.
    It was a terrible thing to watch and be part of, but the unintended humor is what lingers now. You block out all of the brutal reality of it.
    We took him for an MRI when he was having some hip pain. In the middle of it he yelled out "I'm going to have a BOWEL MOVEMENT!"
    Good times.
     
  13. Rimbaud

    Rimbaud Tarnished Silver Gold Supporting Member

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    My wifes grandma lived to be 99, went to visit her in Puerto Rico year before she died...thin, tall, hardly a wrinkle on her face but she had completely lost her marbles 2 years earlier..

    The home service aide would have to put restraints on her arms at night because she would get up and wander through the countryside.

    She loved her blanky and her doll too ...carried them around all day.
     
  14. R13D

    R13D Supporting Member

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    I took care of my mother for a few years;dimentia,and later full on Alzheimers.

    I don't think there is a worse disease. The one thing you at least hope to have in old age is memories of your life and your loved ones.

    In a sense, it's witnessing return to infancy, the most difficult thing my family has faced.
     
  15. SPROING!

    SPROING! Member

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    My mother has dementia. It's a heartbreaking thing to watch.
     
  16. ChorusCrackpot

    ChorusCrackpot Member

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    That feels really frustrating.

    The closest I know, is a good friend of my grandfather who got Alzheimer's and I think dementia as well. He was actually the father of my sister's godfather.

    He started eating sweets like mad, despite not eating them at all during most of his adult life.

    I remember being told that he remembers meeting some kids that were really really nice, not remembering that it was his own grandchildren that visited him that very morning (and he had spent a lot of time with them for all their lives leading up to the onset of his illness).

    Sadly he has passed away now (and my grandfather, from heart failure), He had a really good back garden, like a proper market garden. I think of it whenever I see a similar big garden.
     
  17. mark norwine

    mark norwine Member

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    I have someone living with the early stages now....

    Simple conversations are akin to discussing non-Newtonian calculus with a 4-year-old.
     
  18. Mark Robinson

    Mark Robinson Member

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    Mom will be 90 in a month. It's a rough way to go. I've withdrawn a lot from contact. She's got caregivers who can give her the protection and attention she needs. She's not as dis-associative as the worst Alzheimer's folks, but she's a very shallow shell of her former being and has negligible control of memory.

    I hope and believe that this is one disease that may be solved at some point. Too late for our family, but it's so widespread there's bound to be research and breakthroughs, hopefully sooner.
     
  19. kcprogguitar

    kcprogguitar Member

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    I did that with my dad. You have no idea how much I regret it. You will too.
     

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