Home Life or Work Life ?

Discussion in 'The Pub' started by Johnny Moondog, Apr 13, 2015.

  1. Johnny Moondog

    Johnny Moondog Member

    Jan 23, 2015
    Eastern Canada
    It's a Monday - so of course, I am at work, and would rather be anywhere else.

    Got me thinking - what is your main focus - "Work Life" or "Home Life" ?

    Some of my co-workers are very ambitious, almost to a cut throat / back stab level.
    Me, I just show up on time, do my work, be polite and professional, and get the hell out of here at quittin' time.

    When I am off work in the evenings/weekends - I put work right out of my head.
    When I am off for a few days - I almost never check my work email.

    They (bosses) get my full attention Monday to Friday - but when the clock stops, it's my time - and my attention goes to my home life.

    At the same time - I have noticed that, over the past decade, my more "ambitious/kiss up" co-workers get the more plum assignments, perks and promotions.
    I just hoped that me being here on time, working hard everyday - would be enough to get me noticed - but I don't have the "play the game" mentality.

    I could be more of a squeeky wheel / kiss up / demanding type - but to be honest - all I want out of this place is a paycheck.

    So...what side are you guys on - more focus on "Work Life" or "Home Life" ?
  2. GCDEF

    GCDEF Supporting Member

    Jun 17, 2005
    I like a strong separation between the two. At work, I'll do everything I can to do earn my pay, but at home, I don't think about, want to hear about it or talk to anybody about it.
  3. Bob Longo

    Bob Longo Gold Supporting Member

    Mar 3, 2009
    New Jersey, Puerto Rico, and a jet plane
    I own my own businesses so the majority of my time and focus (for now) is my work life. My wife is my teammate and she predominately runs the home life. When I get opportunity to enjoy my home life, I do so to the fullest. That's not to say I don't make time for other things...guitar, fishing, mountain biking, etc.. It's just that at this stage of my life (i'm 48) work is the main focus.

    If all you want is a paycheck, then you're doing it right.
  4. TheClev

    TheClev As seen on TV

    May 16, 2012
    It all depends on what you want out of life, I guess. You can always get more money. You can always find employment somewhere. But time is the only thing you really can't get more of, so don't waste it all on something you don't enjoy. If work isn't your passion, don't spend all your time working.
  5. DopeyJake

    DopeyJake Member

    Aug 12, 2004
    Flemington, NJ
    The people who put in the extra effort will most always get the promotions.

    The people who consider them a "kiss up" will likely have a stagnant career.

    It's a life choice. Go down that path that gets you where you need to be in life.
  6. Bozak

    Bozak Member

    Apr 14, 2010
    Honestly, if I were in some line of work where my obsession would pay off, in other words if I dedicated every waking hour to the job and just lived work, that hard work could possibly pay off and I wold enjoy a better life, I probably would, I would live for work, but that light is not at the end of the tunnel for me, I'm just a working stiff so for that matter- when the day is done I'm done, it's time to live.

    That being said I'm dedicated, if there's an emergency I'm there, nothing comes before the job, I'll stay until it gets done, but because I have little to no chance of ever getting rich in this line of work, I'm not going to give up my free time to try and do something extra.
  7. RupertB

    RupertB Supporting Member

    Dec 11, 2003
    Raleigh, NC
    In the past, I placed a high value on their separation & work staying at work until I got back. That said, the line has started to blur a bit over the past couple of years.

    I'm ok with it as it has corresponded with some job advancement. Also, I'm recently an empty-nester, so it is timely.

    I've made clear that being available off-hours only goes so far, as I will not be bailing on gigs or taking my laptop so I can work during "vacation" time.
  8. sleewell

    sleewell Member

    Sep 10, 2012
    before i had a kid i would have said work life. now my family is the most important thing.
  9. Tony

    Tony Supporting Member

    Jun 18, 2007
    It's not an either/or thing for me. It's about balance.

    These days I average about 50 hours a week on the job over the long term. That can mean 30ish hours during down times and 60ish in short sprints (around project delivery dates, etc).

    I have a reminder at 6:00 PM every day that pops up on my phone: "STOP WORKING NOW." At that point email is turned off and I don't take any more work calls.

    If the only way to get ahead is to sacrifice my personal life and suck up to the boss... then I'm working for the wrong boss, and it's up to me to change that. Life's too short to hate my day job AND miss out on time w/ family and friends.
  10. Fendegibs

    Fendegibs Member

    Oct 11, 2007
    This is a constant struggle for me, especially now that I have a baby. I work 65-70 hours per week and I'm the primary "breadwinner" at home. I see that as a large part of my responsibility as a dad. Realistically, my work demands are not going to quiet any time soon, so my focus has really been on uni-tasking and pivoting so that I am 100% focused on one single task at any given time. This includes my home life - when I'm home, I'm home. It's easier said than done for sure and I'm not there just yet, but if I can't get the quantity of time at home that I would like, I will do everything in my power to make every minute of it the absolutely highest quality of time.
  11. JWDubois

    JWDubois Member

    Aug 16, 2009
    East TN
    Home life for sure.

    Fortunately, I've had a job that's let me do that. As an young engineer, I paid my dues with lots of field work and long days. These days, as a senior engineer, I can take it easier. But I always worked to support my life, and not the other way around.
  12. neoprimitive

    neoprimitive Member

    Nov 13, 2013
    San Die Go - Hellifornia
    I hate my current job, so for me; home life is the best part of my day. coming home to my wife and 14 month old daughter is my only sanity right now and is my whole world. I'm currently looking for a new job to change my life and make my work situation better. I work hard for my employers, and take pride in what I do, but when its time to clock out, I'm done, I walk out the door and erase the whiteboard in my head. except sometimes I am so angry and disgusted by my employers that I can't stop thinking about it for the rest of the day. but in the end, a job is a job and home is life.
  13. Yer Blues

    Yer Blues Member

    May 26, 2013
    Live to work.
    Work to live.

    Or something.
  14. Campfired

    Campfired Gold Supporting Member

    Jun 9, 2006
    Nutmeg State
    I see a strong correlation between keeping business separate from home life, and happiness in either realm.

    Many of us realize that business is business, and that we must endure that various hardships that occur because of ambitious co-workers, demanding bosses, and difficult clients.

    Yet, when we clock out at the end of the day, how do we feel? Do we recognize that work was business as usual? Or do we "bring our work home with us"?

    If we do the latter, something needs to change. The daily stresses from work can be overwhelming if left unchecked, and family life is much less enjoyable if job stress causes us distress. Ask yourself, do you feel that your job performance causes you anxiety or distress? Is it possible to separate your work life from your home life?

    If anyone in your family feels pressured with any facet of their lives, whether it be their jobs, or their relationships, or their activities, realize that you can experience more joy when you adjust and regularly apply simple principles in your daily routine.

    In this manner, you will feel less stress, your home life will be happier, and you will effectively deal with difficult situations that occur with you workplace.

    Here's several ways of understanding these principles:

    1) Face hardships with a smile.

    2) Use humor to defuse potentially tense situations. A demanding boss need not ruin your day if it is possible to work efficiently with the humor of an Australian. :)

    3) When on the clock, don't continually look at your watch, thinking, "How many more hours until quitting time?"

    4) When you regularly put these principles into practice, there will be less stress that you will bring home with you, you can face your GF or wife or family with a brighter outlook, and you can understand the simple concept why you were put on this earth in the first place: To enjoy both your work and home life, finding a balance between both, and leaving the pressures of life to those who stress and suffer each day because they have not adjusted or applied these principles.
  15. T Dizz

    T Dizz Member

    Jan 20, 2015
    Erotic City MN
    totally. I don't have a "career" I have a job. I punch in, punch out get paid and go home. No stress. The way I like it. I work so I can afford to do the things I want to do when I'm not working.
  16. Dumdeediddle

    Dumdeediddle Supporting Member

    Oct 23, 2012
    Mr. Moondog -
    Only my opinion of course, but you got the Right way of looking at it.
    And these "Professionals" you speak of ? Only difference they have is - When they slip the Knife in (back there) - they do it while being maybe a bit better dressed, Quieter & more Polite.
    And when you get down the road a Bit more, you might notice - all those Folks who had no life, & the ones who spent so much time Stabbing a Stomping others faces into the cement - a good portion of them will be no better off than you. Many worse.
    "When on the clock, don't continually look at your watch, thinking, "How many more hours until quitting time?" - Good thought.
    Also -seemed to me ,I have seen some folks work WAY way harder at avoiding doing any work at work than just doing the job. The time always passes SO much faster when you get into it & are Involved. Of Course, in some Jobs there is nothing TO get involved with. That's when you need to find a New one (If you can).
  17. GSHARP

    GSHARP Member

    May 15, 2007
    I will sound selfish but... Work, money, they're all only a MEAN to get material stuff, they are not my GOAL.

    I see work as a win-win situation: both for me and my employer. I work, he pays me for my skills, that stops right there. My employer is not my friend, it's a business relationship.

    I see money as a mean to get things, nothing more. I don't need to be a millionnaire, I concentrate on other things.

    It probably makes me non-ambitious but I don't care. I choose to live life instead of working it.

    But it's only me, and who am I to judge other people's business?
  18. pickaguitar

    pickaguitar 2011 TGP Silver Medalist Silver Supporting Member

    Oct 7, 2005
    I definitely live for anything outside of work. I have a degree and a career but it's not something to live my life by. Corporations do not care about me nor do I care about them...it's just a trade off really
  19. Campfired

    Campfired Gold Supporting Member

    Jun 9, 2006
    Nutmeg State
    These are the same individuals at gigs who ask you to turn down. Remember to respond quietly instead of increasing your volume.

    Backstabbing and Stomping = Just Being Pushy. There are many ways you can cope with these types. Humor defuses most tense situations.

    Yeah, this occurred to me today. You might encounter someone else who is a hack who is also a clock-watcher that is asking you to perform under pressure.

    It's called, "Hurry up and wait." Many people think they can do all of their work at the beginning of the week, then slack off the remainder of the week. Not so. Work at a steady pace, and take it one day at a time.
  20. harmonicator

    harmonicator Member

    Nov 14, 2008
    Central CA
    Extra work is one thing. Slimy bureaucrat is another. It is required for rising the ranks in most disfunctional workplaces. The kissers are more than happy to let those with talent and pride in their work continue to make things run, while they focus on selling themselves.

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