"I'm not gonna lie"

Discussion in 'The Pub' started by phoenix 7, May 4, 2019.

  1. twoheadedboy

    twoheadedboy Member

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    I also find this to be really weird. To me, it suggests that the person had an internal debate about whether to lie, and decided not to. Somehow, the people in my life who are consistently honest never have to tell me that they aren't lying.
     
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  2. phoenix 7

    phoenix 7 Member

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    Sometimes a speaker's words say more than the speaker consciously intends (similar to parapraxis). I've noticed that some people who say "I'm not gonna lie" strike me as people who might lie frequently.
     
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  3. Scrapperz

    Scrapperz Member

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    Try to keep in mind that it's the "smart ones" that can really lie good. If someone is talking like the op suggests they may not be smart enough to lie without getting caught right away.

    I was always reminded it's the very smart people who can lie and get away with it for some years before getting caught.
     
    Last edited: May 4, 2019
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  4. Timcito

    Timcito Member

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    Really? That's a rather dark response, isn't it?! Yes, I suppose it's possible, but if it is, I suspect that it's a limited explanation. I think in most cases it is a strategic conversational signal for a personal view which is debatable or even mildly confrontational. Someone mentioned 'with all due respect' as a conversational strategy for softening the blow of criticism, and I'd agree with that. In both of these phrases, the sum is greater than their individual parts.
     
  5. phoenix 7

    phoenix 7 Member

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    Ha ha - yes, "metaphorically like" would make more sense.
     
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  6. General_Specific

    General_Specific Member

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    No. It doesn't mean, "I usually lie, but now I won't". It means, "I would prefer not to say this to you, but I am going to be frank"

    Doctor, will I be ok?

    To be honest, you will be dead within a week.


    Honestly, I think threads like this are low hanging fruit. We all know the intention behind such idioms.
     
  7. RickC

    RickC Gold Supporting Member

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    You ain't lyin...
     
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  8. Scrapperz

    Scrapperz Member

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    Ahhh, the Ol Freudian slip.
     
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  9. Muzzy

    Muzzy Supporting Member

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    It's true, believe me.
     
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  10. Vintage_

    Vintage_ Member

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    But at this point it's become more of a meme.
     
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  11. Pedro58

    Pedro58 Member

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    I don't mind the OP's phrase so much. It seems innocent enough because it's just a piece of conversational small-talk like comments on the weather. But I admit that it gets my attention. And not in a good way. I don't think it comes from a frequent liar. I think it comes from someone who needs your support or needs a confidant. If they tell you the honest truth, you'll feel a sort of simpatico with them. Sometimes, it's with a good and genuine motive.

    I had a supervisor that would approach me with "You're going to hate me." It meant I had been assigned a task that others did not want or had failed to do. Ugh. I hated the manipulative nature of the phrase. I was occasionally tempted to tell this person "I already hate you." But I didn't. I knew it was just a conversational habit.

    The alternative to "Let me be honest" is to go ahead and say the shockingly honest, and often critical or insulting thing... and end your statement with "Bless his/her heart!" Clever.
     
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  12. Scrapperz

    Scrapperz Member

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    :facepalm
     
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  13. 84Bravo

    84Bravo Member

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    I’ll be honest with you. Most people lie.
     
  14. 59Vampire

    59Vampire Silver Supporting Member

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    i hate that phrase. It is right upo there with "Not for nothing".
     
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  15. RickC

    RickC Gold Supporting Member

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    Everything I say is a lie. Think about it
     
  16. Thumpalumpacus

    Thumpalumpacus Member

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    Generally speaking, when they use this preface, they're saying, "My opinion is not popular but I will say it plainly anyway." The temptation to lie can be strong when honesty threatens someone with social opprobrium, vilification, or even violence.

    Not to say it isn't overused at times.
     
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  17. Scrapperz

    Scrapperz Member

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    Literally? :rotflmao
     
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  18. sixstringfuel

    sixstringfuel Hotdogs kill Silver Supporting Member

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    C'mon.. .you're pulling my leg.
     
  19. Glenn D.

    Glenn D. Member

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    I made a huge effort to substitute "franK" for "honest", and that's worked out okay.
     
  20. FenderBigot

    FenderBigot Supporting Member

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    I decided to use “direct” in place of honest... works most of the time.
     
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