Is this a di*k move? Guitar loan related.... Update/Conclusion

atomicmoondog

Member
Messages
459
I learned a long time ago that if I “loan” something to someone, even with agreed-to conditions, it’s best to know in my mind that I possibly gave it away unconditionally. Otherwise, I don’t loan it. It saves a lot of drama, stress and heartache down the road. Money is money. Stuff is stuff. It’s not worth risking relationships over.
 

moosewayne

Silver Supporting Member
Messages
5,937
I loaned an old super Strat to my teenage sister in law. Five years later it comes back stripped of anything you can take off a FR. Do I care? No. I never expected it back.

The OP has ants in his pants because he’s GASsing for more gear. Is it worth the family strain to satisfy that selfish desire? Not in my mind.

Never loan what you can’t afford to lose, and anytime you loan to family/friends, understand that you write whatever it is off. Especially after 15 years.
No, the OP can go get new gear anytime he wants.
The OP's initial and main point is his nephew isn't playing the guitar anymore would rather have it back than have it sit at his brother's house.
 
Messages
12
Get it back. A loan is a loan and a gift is a gift. You said you loaned it to him so if you want it back for whatever reason, you shouldn’t feel guilty about getting it back. If your brother or nephew give you crap about it, then that would be a dick move on their part.
 

RC Mike

Member
Messages
317
No, the OP can go get new gear anytime he wants.
The OP's initial and main point is his nephew isn't playing the guitar anymore would rather have it back than have it sit at his brother's house.
“I have a nice collection and I'm almost positive I'll sell it to finance another Ric or amp.”

Whenever someone says it’s not about the money, it’s about the money.

I’m not sure what you’re looking for here. Consensus? The backing of strangers? You’ll do what you want for whatever reason. Man up, do what you think is right, and don’t get defensive or indignant about any consequences. Life is no hard than we make it.
 

blues

Silver Supporting Member
Messages
5,651
Just go ask for it back. You ask a guestion on a forum and your going to get different answers.
 

BlueRiff

Senior Member
Messages
6,193
Several years ago, I dunno 15 or so, I 'loaned' a Fender Strat to my nephew. I loaned it with the caveats that
1. he could not sell it.
2. he can keep it as long as he plays it. If it just sits around in the case, then I want it back.

Fast forward to now, I come to find out the Strat has been living at my brothers' house. My nephew keeps it there for something to strum on when he visits his mom and dad.
My nephew is in grad school, several states away and highly doubtful he'll ever move back to the area.

Is it a dick move to want the guitar back?
I have a nice collection and I'm almost positive I'll sell it to finance another Ric or amp. Lord knows my brother makes enough $$ to buy an Am. Std. Strat any time he wants, and the guitar was loaned to my nephew--NOT my brother.

Anyone ever find themselves in a similar situation?
I'd be very curious to know your thoughts.....
I’ll refer to clause (2) which states “as long as he plays it”. Well - he plays it. Because you didn’t put a required frequency of playing in your contract, you are basically SOL. Under the current language, any time interval can elapse between playing sessions. Also - you forgot to include a no ownership transfer in your contract. Your lawyer did not do you any favors here. Oh that’s right - you forgot to hire one! SERIOUSLY though - you should ask for it back if you want it. Just let him know since he barely touches it, you want to use it. He can buy his own. That is not a dick move at all IMO.
 

Motterpaul

Tone is in the Ears
Messages
12,720
first world problem - just take it back, don't even ask or explain. They obviously don't care that much.
 

mooncobra

Silver Supporting Member
Messages
604
After 15 years I would not even consider asking for it back, especially just to sell it for another guitar purchase. But hey, that’s just me.

The only way I could see asking for it back would be if I somehow didn’t have a guitar to play, and I asked my nephew to lend it back to me until I was able to acquire a new guitar.
 

NateW.

Member
Messages
50
Nobody here understands the dynamics in your family better than you.

So, a good measuring stick may be the fact that you felt the need to ask if taking the guitar back is a d**k move.

Follow your instinct.
 

Ry@n

Member
Messages
325
After 15 years I would not even consider asking for it back, especially just to sell it for another guitar purchase. But hey, that’s just me.

The only way I could see asking for it back would be if I somehow didn’t have a guitar to play, and I asked my nephew to lend it back to me until I was able to acquire a new guitar.
If it was $800 in cash that belonged to you just sitting at a brother’s house, would you not want the cash?
 

Betos

Silver Supporting Member
Messages
3,414
I think everyone on this thread is overlooking a major issue here....


Replacing a STRAT with a RIC???
 
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syzygy

Member
Messages
111
Break into the brother's house when no one's around & steal guitar back. On the nephew's next visit casually ask "Hey are you still playing that guitar I loaned you?" When nephew says, "It got stolen", OP responds, "You know you're going to have to pay me back". Triple win for OP, getting the guitar back & having someone else fund the next gear purchase. OP can later make up a BS story about finding the guitar at a swap meet, then re-loan to nephew.
 
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Slapshot1977

Silver Supporting Member
Messages
751
It’s funny the people that question the OP’s motives. What does it matter if he wants it back to sell or use as firewood? What if he sells it to buy another guitar? How is that any different than wanting it back to play it?

In the end it’s his to do as he pleases and he shouldn’t have to explain to his nephew or feel bad about it.
 

-sku-

Member
Messages
718
It’s funny the people that question the OP’s motives. What does it matter if he wants it back to sell or use as firewood? What if he sells it to buy another guitar? How is that any different than wanting it back to play it?

In the end it’s his to do as he pleases and he shouldn’t have to explain to his nephew or feel bad about it.
With a small remark that he asks us what he should do, you know, by creating this thread.
 




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