That moment when you know you shouldn't be friends with some people

Discussion in 'The Pub' started by jcmark611, May 28, 2015.

  1. jcmark611

    jcmark611 Member

    Messages:
    6,977
    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2007
    When your friend sends a text asking how long it's been since you smoked pot because he needs your urine.

    You go to a party and watch three dudes enter a bathroom with a backpack.

    When, at the same party, you get cornered by a guy telling you how the police dragged him out of bed for violating an EPO and how his wife stole prescription pads from a doctor's office.


    Yeah, it might be time for new friends.
     
  2. derekd

    derekd Supporting Member

    Messages:
    34,719
    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2007
    Location:
    In a van down by the river
    I went through that sort of pruning a long time ago.

    These days I prune for over the top politics (either side), chronic negativity, and those friendships where, if I don't initiate, the friendship never moves.

    Life is too short for lousy friends. Break out the pruning shears! Good luck with it.
     
    MikeVB and ford like this.
  3. 5881

    5881 Supporting Member

    Messages:
    957
    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2006
    Location:
    Phila. PA
    I find that with a few friends I have if I looked at them on paper I'd say I'd never be friends with them, yet socially I enjoy their company. Things like questionable racial outlooks, how they are with their family, as well as the "if I did not stay in contact they'd disappear". I guess at 57 I should be more selective.
     
  4. AA864

    AA864 Supporting Member

    Messages:
    2,364
    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2011
    >>and those friendships where, if I don't initiate, the friendship never moves.
    Good thread. I agree with this one ^^^ and have pruned these types for years.
    My brother was like that and I dropped him a decade ago.

    I recently dropped a musician friend (or so I thought). We had a weekly open mic gig as the house band. I was bringing in new songs every week to keep it fresh and bringing my A game, on time, sober, yada, yada. I take a week off to go to Cabo and come back and he had added another guitarist on top of me (not to replace me, or so he says, but just to add another member). No discussion, no input from me, just hey, we have a new band member, surprise. I finished the night and told him consider this my last night. I'm done (with the gig and him).
     
  5. FFTT

    FFTT Member

    Messages:
    28,403
    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2007
    Associates who don't give you the time of day unless they want something from you.
    Associates who put you down behind your back.
    Bigots, bullys and abusive people.
     
  6. ellsworthman

    ellsworthman Silver Supporting Member

    Messages:
    10,927
    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2014
    Same here. I've been fortunate to have a group of friends I've known for close to 40 years, but their numbers have shrunk a bit in the past few years for just these reasons. I've found that the time is more enjoyable with the ones I still socialize with.
     
    derekd likes this.
  7. JWDubois

    JWDubois Member

    Messages:
    6,490
    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2009
    Location:
    East TN
    I organized a week long ski trip for two of my friends and two of their friends. I did everything, plane tickets, condo, car rental.

    Before the week was over I knew I would be dropping them all. I liked them individually, but together they were like a non stop skinhead Tea Party convention.
     
    derekd likes this.
  8. Mark Robinson

    Mark Robinson Member

    Messages:
    7,088
    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2002
    Location:
    Redondo Beach, California
    When the car (barracuda) is accelerating rapidly, travelling at over 100 mph in a 35 mph zone, crests a hill headed down and you get a little negative G thing happening. The driver is looking at you with this crazed look instead of looking at the road, that'll do it.

    On another evening, speeding down a country road, 5 knuckleheads in a mom's station wagon, driver starts swerving in 20 foot sweeps, and then does a 270 degree spin in the road, dislodging two hubcaps from the passenger side. You and the other stumbling idiots search in the weeds for a half hour but the hub caps are never seen again. Come to think of it, they were probably on the other side of the road.
     
  9. teefus

    teefus Silver Supporting Member

    Messages:
    7,747
    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2004
    my revelation was when a friend asked me to break into his car and steal his video camera so he could make an insurance claim and get the newer version. the best part was that he wanted me to pay him some $$ for the opportunity to keep his old, outdated camera. haven't spoken to him since.
     
  10. pickaguitar

    pickaguitar 2011 TGP Silver Medalist Silver Supporting Member

    Messages:
    20,516
    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2005
    Location:
    TEXAS
    I disagree. I would be a good friend and help in this circumstance
     
  11. ELmiguel

    ELmiguel Member

    Messages:
    3,563
    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2013
    Location:
    East Coast of USA
    When I was younger if someone said they "needed a place to crash for a few days". Or, borrow my car.
     
  12. Guinness Lad

    Guinness Lad Silver Supporting Member

    Messages:
    15,339
    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2004
    Location:
    On top a mountain of Chocolate Chips
    had a friend who needed a job, I recommended him at a place I worked. They hired him and a few months later my boss calls me and asks, "why the guy has some of our products in his car?" I told him, "I have no idea why he would do it". My boss said, "all he had to do was ask and it was no big deal, but just taking it wasn't cool". I told him. "I was sorry and to do what you need". That ended our friendship.
     
  13. Tylenol Jones

    Tylenol Jones Member

    Messages:
    2,373
    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2014
    When I was younger, I thought that life was a popularity contest. I had a lot of so-called friends. Little by little, I saw the reasons why these people weren't friends at all but just acquaintances.

    Nowadays, I have a tight circle of friends and it's populated by a few people who are high-quality generous and kind individuals. I'd rather have that.
     
    derekd likes this.
  14. derekd

    derekd Supporting Member

    Messages:
    34,719
    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2007
    Location:
    In a van down by the river
    It is tough when you stick your neck out for someone, particularly an employment opportunity, and they piss all over it.
     
  15. Fred Farkus

    Fred Farkus Gold Supporting Member

    Messages:
    15,172
    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2009
    Was platonic friends with a woman I worked with musically. Arranged her songs, helped her through a near-suicidal depression. Gave her a lot of support but after that, she was always "busy". Only time I heard from her was when she needed something. There wasn't a particular moment, more just a creeping feeling that I had served my purpose. Washed my hands of that one.
     
  16. gigs

    gigs Member

    Messages:
    10,148
    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2009
    Location:
    Pittsburgh - aka SIX-burgh
    Whatever ya do, don't loan him $10 for breakfast.
     
    TwoTubMan likes this.
  17. jhc

    jhc Senior Member

    Messages:
    12,540
    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2005
    Location:
    Seattle
    or better yet:

     
    derekd likes this.
  18. TheoDog

    TheoDog Silver Supporting Member

    Messages:
    18,460
    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2011
    Location:
    Bethany, OK
    Ahh college. Good times.
    Best way to fix this crap- marriage. If that doesn't work- kids.
    I can't even get in trouble with my real friends anymore.
     
    gigs likes this.
  19. Blanket Jackson

    Blanket Jackson It's Time For Action Silver Supporting Member

    Messages:
    13,461
    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2009
    Location:
    Brooklyn NY
  20. Stike

    Stike Member

    Messages:
    12,340
    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2004
    Location:
    Durham, NC
    When they pause mid sentence and look over both shoulders before telling you something bigoted that you weren't expecting or wanting to hear.
     

Share This Page