Woman FB Friend Recently Passed Away & Only Now Found Out 'She' was Once A 'Male' Bandmate

Discussion in 'The Pub' started by Lucidology, Apr 14, 2016.

  1. Lucidology

    Lucidology Member

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    Whoa!! Talk about Shocker of all Shockers...!!
    This Woman used to be a great 'male' keyboard player/singer I gigged with on & off for many years.
    Had no idea he had changed his name & his sex ... Not a clue it was 'him',
    other then that 'she' was also a full-time, career Musician living in Atlanta, Georgia.

    There was never any indication which I can recall (other than that he loved to cook & sometimes showed a 'campy' side ...
    However, only when a woman was around)

    This guy had more dates than you can possibly imagine...
    Women loved him & he loved 'em back.
    He'd have 'em in bed faster than anyone else i had ever meet ...
     
    Last edited: Apr 14, 2016
  2. Bluplirst

    Bluplirst Supporting Member

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    Georgie to Georgia huh? Iseewhatyoudidthere
     
  3. marytakesadrag

    marytakesadrag Member

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    That is a pretty wild coincidence.

    Condolences to their family for their loss, and to you (not sure how close y'all were).
     
  4. sergiodeblanc

    sergiodeblanc Member

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    Did you play with her before and after transitioning without her saying anything? Like you knew them independently as two different people?

    Her previous exploits with women when she lived as a male don't mean anything. Gender and sexuality are two different things.
     
  5. Blues Power

    Blues Power Member

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    oh do tell more.............I have i good one

    back when I was in the corps a bunch of "buy me drink girls" were hanging at a local bar row in what they call "The Gut" in Toulon France. a buddy of mine from The Bronx hooked up with one. after about a half hour of kissy kissy when he went to cop a feel he got a hand full.

    i heard the loudest NY accent of my life in not so many decent words that i can post.
    his name was Jorge Colon, he started WW III and just about leveled the bar single handedly. MPs and French police were all over him.

    I still laughed about that today just as hard as I did 35 years ago
    he ended up doing 90 days in the brig for assaulting 3 MPs. The Frenchies dropped their charges out of pity for him.

    I sware to this day I was not able to tell she was a him. "it" looked good......
     
    Last edited: Apr 14, 2016
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  6. thewhit

    thewhit Silver Supporting Member

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    Possibly tired of receiving extra pay for the same work and desire to be charged more for dry cleaning.
     
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  7. Lucidology

    Lucidology Member

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    Independently ... Two different people..

    Was really close to this guy when I gigged with him throughout the country ... Was surely a best bud type of cat.
    Had a very successful House Band gig in Atlanta at a place called the Sandpiper... (even won award for the city's "Best Listening" Act...

    Lived with him & his second wife in Irving, Texas just before hitting the road in another band who toured the states...
    Initially met him in NY ... as he played keys as part of our entourage under the auspices of Pete Seeger

    Only knew her on FB for close to 3 years... and during those years she never revealed that fact that she was my ol' buddy Jay ...
     
  8. Killed_by_Death

    Killed_by_Death Member

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    I was a little surprised when one of my FB "friends" sent out a status about how she was going to court & everybody pray for her.

    The next thing I know, I see her face on the local news & she was making meth in her mobile home in front of her child.
    She's in jail now, but I have no idea what happened to the child. I hope the father picked up the responsibility.
     
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  9. pbmw

    pbmw Member

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    I had a good friend in England in the early 60's that raced motorcycles. Mike Dunn. Later became Michelle. Good guy.
    I have two other Transgendered friends. One I race with and one that worked in my machine shop. You never knew if you were going to get Andy or Andi. Very good taste in music. Turned me on to Johnny A among others. One hell of a mechanic. Andy's hobby was rebuilding Unimog's
    People are who they are. Not who we'd like them to be.
     
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  10. Blues Power

    Blues Power Member

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    I think Lou Reed wrote the book on this subject matter :)
     
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  11. Yer Blues

    Yer Blues Member

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    Wow.... 2hbstrat couldn't make that up!
     
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  12. Yer Blues

    Yer Blues Member

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    I've never heard that before, but it is a pretty awesome phrase.
     
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  13. EricPeterson

    EricPeterson Member

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    Interesting situation Joe, sorry for the loss of your friend. Maybe she wanted to tell you but never got the chance, I could see how that might be a hard conversation to have.
     
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  14. pbmw

    pbmw Member

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    I've had the conversation with Debi, my friend I race with. We were talking and I said if I had to use one word to describe Andi it would be "Confused". She said, "Well you think you're confused..."
    The tragic thing is the suicide rate.
     
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  15. Tone_Terrific

    Tone_Terrific Supporting Member

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    Mike Duff (Canadian) if we are on the same page here.
     
  16. pbmw

    pbmw Member

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    You are correct
    Mike Duff. I'm old and can't remember anything this early in the morning.
     
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  17. Lucidology

    Lucidology Member

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    Most certainly ...
    Actually woke up this morning feeling very sad that She didn't tell me ...
    & had the inner experience of losing a great friend in more than one way.

    I knew the guy well enough that non-judgemental acceptance would have been very easy ...
    In fact ...We could have even 'joked' about it ... that's how good of buds we'd been through out the years ...
     
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  18. Roark

    Roark Member

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    Sorry for your friend, but.

    meh...Learn your part, play it and be decent at it. Don't care who you are in your spare time, just don't get my butt kicked and don't hit on my wife.
     
  19. Lucidology

    Lucidology Member

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    What ...?
     
  20. Roark

    Roark Member

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    I've played with all kinds of folks, just saying it doesn't matter to me what or who you do at the time, I was basically agreeing with you that you could still be friends no matter the circumstances.

    Just don't act like a fool and get me beat up and don't hit on my wife. My basic rules for band mates.

    And condolences for your friend.
     
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